Oh boy. I know, in general, my heroine’s phenotype, but when it comes to her hair I’m having a real struggle. There is so much I can do with what she does with her hair that I find myself at a loss as to what I think would be the best option.
I vacillate widely from moment to the next about how she does her hair as the story opens. In this third draft, I’m really taking how I introduce my heroine a lot more seriously. I don’t want to sexualize her in any sort of gratuitous way because if I did anything like that there would be “woke” portions of the audience that would that would pitch a fucking fit.
They would say I’m just another horny CIS white male who is wants to fuck my heroine and is obsessed with boobs. As such, I am really self-conscious about how much I talk about my heroine’s appearance. And, yet, at the same time, I want to give readers a clear understanding in their mind’s eye of…her appearance.
My heroine kind of looks like this in my mind’s eye.
As a CIS white male writing from the POV of a female POC it’s kind of a no win situation. Woke people just want me to drop dead, not try to give them the representation they claim to want in their fiction. Only transgender, undocumented Mexicans can tell the type of stories I want to tell. Forgive me, I’m a bit grumpy and tipsy at the moment.
Anyway, you have to give me credit for at least understanding the sticky wicket I’m wading into. I get it. I’m a CIS white male, a member of the patriarchy and I should just shut up and let women and POC tell stories. But I’m an asshole and have a story to tell.
I’m trying to be as empathetic as possible, all things considered.
I’m extremely paranoid and self-conscious when it comes to writing the female characters in this novel I’m working on. My greatest fear is that I’ll somehow get some element of being a woman wrong and I’ll be held up by some Tik-Toker as yet another example of how men shouldn’t even write female characters at all.
My heroine looks like a younger version of Olivia Munn.
Ugh.
Just in the last few days, I’ve had two notable instances of this situation come up.
One was I have a very specific vision of what my heroine looks like and, as a part of that, I want to convey to the reader some sense of her bosom. Now, some context — Stieg Larsson spent an entire scene going into detail about Lisbeth Salander’s relationship to her breasts, so it’s not like it can’t be done. My fear is that in my quest to give the audience a clear understand on that front, that some of the squeaky wheels reading will think I’m obsessed with boobs. (But, in all honesty, who isn’t?)
I’ve managed to figure out a few ways of indicate what I want to show the audience without wallowing in gratuitous verbiage about breasts.
Meanwhile, the other issue I’ve had to address dealt with periods. I have a really interesting provocative scene that talks about that issue head on, but I’ve kind of been stressed out all day about it because I was afraid that there was some aspect of it all that I just was missing. I finally talked to a woman about the specific plot point I was concerned about and she assured me I had it right.
Anyway, I fear that, by definition, any attempt on my part to write about women will be poo-pooed by some of the more “woke” elements of the audience for no other reason than I’m a “CIS white male.” If I had some other, more exotic background they wouldn’t blink an eye.
So, here is a picture that has apparently “triggered” the more “woke” amongst us:
The reason is — there aren’t enough non-white people in the picture. And, yet, Olivia Munn is there, hamming things up in a very conspicuous manner and she ain’t white.
So, I suppose the issue is — either Olivia Munn isn’t close enough to the camera to suit the “woke” people who are complaining, or these “woke” people are upset there aren’t any black people in the picture and an Amerasian person doesn’t count towards the “white liberals have to have x number of non-white friends at their dinner party not to be hypocrites” metric?
To me, the issue is not the whole suck-your-own-cock woke nature of things, but how fucking wealthy everyone in this picture is! Everyone in the picture above has GOT to be at LEAST a multi-millionaire and they live in their bubble of liberal whiteness with pretty much total disregard for us Poors.
What’s more, this picture from Kristen Bell also gives us validation of our most basic assumptions about celebrity — they really do all know each other and that’s why nepobabies control everything.
While I general believe the whole idea of “woke” is everything and nothing relative to the need of an ambitious Republican lawmaker trying to scare up votes, it’s shit like people attacking the Bell picture that really does annoy me. Should they have strategically put Munn closer to the camera to put at least one non-white person closer to the frame?
I found Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s role in Dial of Destiny to be one that established her as a Hollywood star. And, yet, from the way some commenters talk, you would think that not only did she suck, but that she took over the movie in a “woke” attempt to hand the Indy franchise over to her.
Now, here’s the context — there was a massive amount of bonkers chatter on YouTube that the time travel element of the movie was originially meant to be a way to turn Waller-Bridge into Indiana Jones by erasing Harrison Ford’s version from time altogether. They really got themselves worked out into an anti-woke Hollywood lather about this possibility.
And…then…it didn’t happen.
They claimed “victory” over the evil forces of Woke Hollywood, but I have my doubts. While I understand the fears — that definitely does sound like something Kathleen Kennedy would do to Indiana Jones — I just am not prepared to believe that was ever seriously considered, much less shot.
But, who knows.
The key thing to remember is I think, ultimately, the issue of who to turn the Indy franchise over to will be mooted because of technology. Soon enough, our digital assistant will scan our face, determine our mood and give us a very specific Indy movie that is completely different anything anyone else is watching at that particular moment.
It seems a foregone conclusion at this point.
I do wish, however, that Waller-Bridge could get her own franchise playing Dr. Susan Calvin of the I, Robot short stories. That would be great!
If you want to see how fucked up American politics are, look no further than the issue of “protect trans kids.” Because of all the disinformation flying around this issue — from both sides — I’ve given some serious thought to what I think about the issue.
The key take away from this particular clusterfuck is….there really aren’t that many “trans kids” to protect. It’s not like there are thousands of children who are demanding they take the medical steps necessary to transition. There are a lot of sexually confused kids — like there have always been since the dawn of time — who don’t know what they are or what they want and they’re being used as pawns on “both sides” to make political points.
Because the Left makes a big deal about “protect trans kids,” the Right flips out that there are “trans kids” that need to be “protected” in the first place.
The whole thing is very very fucked up because, from my experience, if you don’t cling to the established center-Left narrative about “protect trans kids” even though there really aren’t that many trans kids to protect….you are in for shit ton of trouble. From both sides! Either the Left things you’re Satan, or the Right demands you becoming just as hysterical as they are about this issue — and other culture war issues — for them to accept you.
Ugh. Fuck all that.
I totally validate the alarm and anger that a lot of Trans Rights advocates have stimming from violence and all that. My only concern is maybe be a little less crazy when it comes to demanding everyone hone to the extremist dictates of the “protect trans kids” narrative.
There is so much to unpack about Blazing Saddles. And I’m lazy and don’t want to give this post the proper research, so think of this as more of a off-the-top-of-the-head vibe check than something you might find on, say Vox.
Anyway, the misguided discourse about Blazing Saddles is it “couldn’t be made today” because it uses the N-word and all that. The people who say such things usually are older, white and get “triggered” by just the mere mention of the term “woke.”
But that is A LOT going on with this movie.
The chief thing is the context in which the movie was made. The movie was intended to be a critique of white racism. And, yet, because it came out a long time ago and because of how Blue and Red no longer interact with each other unless they’re screaming at each other, Reds think that the fact that the movie “couldn’t be released today” is a sign of the decline and fall of Western civilization.
This brings up to interesting questions.
One is, would these “anti-woke” MAGA people feel the same way if, instead of being “triggered,” “cultural Leftists” embraced this hypothetical version of the movie being released today? I mean, white people — and specifically the type of people you consider MAGA — are portrayed in the movie as racist morons. The very thing that MAGA is very, very touchy about being considered today. So, the pining after this movie on the part of MAGA is a result of a lost of context — they’re taking broad, anti-racist satire at face value and liking what they see.
Which brings up the SECOND point.
Given the misguided and conflated understanding of the movie that MAGA has — that it being released was a symbol of when America was “great,” what does that mean about MAGA? Why is MAGA so eager to be able to say the N-word if they don’t think of themselves of racist? Why are MAGA people so angry and aggrieved all the time?
The answer is, of course, that MAGA is a symptom, a side effect of the loss of power by straight white Christian men. (I fucking hate MAGA, by the way.)
Anyway. You could pretty much write a 10,000 word New Yorker article about this movie and still not convince some MAGA people that they’re missing the entire point of the movie!
What I can compare it to is how women’s fashion magazines sometimes have nudity, but all some dudes see — despite the context — is “tits and ass.”
I think it’s time to end the gender-specific acting categories at the Oscars. I believe this not because of any passionate fondness for non-binary people, but rather I just think its time.
Just like how I believe young women should be required to sign up for Selective Service, I think we should give male and female actors the opportunity to go head-to-head. I’m well aware that there are A LOT of problems with this idea. The whole non-binary issue — which is what the Little Gold Men podcast focused on — is besides the point.
We need to move past having Best Actor and Best Actress nominees, etc, so the point where men and women are judged by their ability head to head as opposed to sequestered by sex. From what I tell from the Little Gold Men podcast, The Academy is very, very slow to change such things.
I wouldn’t focus on the whole non-binary issue if I was marketing this for the broader public. I have no problem with non-binary people, but if their concerns are played up in any change of the categories then a lot of mainstream people will roll their eyes at how clueless Hollywood is.
But if you just say this is a “modernization” of the Oscars, then I think a lot of people will embrace it without all the “woke” fuss.
Introduction Whenever someone tries to seriously discuss the concept of “being woke” one has to make it clear that it’s a concept largely defined by people who hate it. And, they themselves, really have no idea what it means. The definition of “woke” is, thus, one of just “vibes.”
In fact, the self-appointed definers of “woke” — mostly MAGA conservatives — want there to be no clear definition so everything and nothing can be “woke” as is necessary to “own” the libs. Much like how MAGA Republicans refuse to tell us when, in fact, America was “great,” so, too, do these self-same Republicans refuse to give us any clear definition of what “to be woke” is.
As such, we’re left rummaging through the often very dumb, very vacuous arguments made by MAGA Republicans when they want to juice the base to vote. So, with that in mind, let’s address the issue at had, “What is woke?”
Terror By Vibe It seems clear to me that the entire notion of “wokness” says more about MAGA Republican conservatives than it does the word itself. Much of the hysterical rhetoric about “wokeness” on the part of Republicans is a direct, kneejerk reaction to the combination of the browning of America and the growing economic power of women.
What’s more, if you scramble all of this in the blinder of the greater Fox News and conservative podcast echo chamber, you end up in a situation where people who should know better will tell you with a straight face that “libs” “love” abortions to the point that they’re practicing infanticide. In fact, in my discussion with my conservative relatives — who I love dearly — it definitely seems as though a lot of the outrage over “wokeness” is more anger over how modern society talks about in a very public manner things they feel should be kept private and secret.
So, these people who are so upset about abortion or the gay movement probably don’t mind that either one exists, but they ARE upset at what they perceive is the very public woke agenda on these topics. This is all an extension of how conservative Republicans want to establish an autocratic white Christian ethnostate — sometimes without even realizing that that is, in fact, what they want.
In short, they find the “woke” movement…annoying.
They just know, in general, they hate people who are “woke” — even though they really don’t know what “being woke” means. They just do a vibe check on the issues important to “woke” people and get upset that anyone would think such a thing.
In short, conservative (MAGA) Republicans find woke people really, really annoying for any number of reasons. They neither understand them nor, in some cases, even want to be in the same Union with them.
‘Go Woke, Go Broke’ One thing that any discussion of “being woke” has to mention is there is, in fact, a small but vocal portion of the liberal-progressive movement that has such a narrow minded, strict orthodox about certain issues that they drive traditional conservatives into the arms of fascists.
Take, for instance, the transgender movement.
There is a lot of talk about “protecting trans kids” within “woke” liberal-progressive circles which causes MAGA Republicans to, in turn, freak out at the idea that there are even “trans kids” to be “protected” in the first place. From what I can gather, the idea of “trans kids” is extremely muddled and misleading.
While, yes, growing number of children under 18 are identifying as “trans” the number of children actually transitioning is near zero, if not, in fact, zero. But because woke people run around screaming about how need to “protect trans kids,” MAGA bigots assume such “gender affirming care” must be happen all the time, when, in fact, it’s not.
But it suits the purposes of the all those MAGA conservative podcasts with time to fill and advertisements to sell, so they talk and talk and talk and talk about something that really doesn’t even exist — children under 18 medically changing their gender.
Those libs aren’t going to own themselves, you know.
There is a lot — A LOT — of pretty basic moralism involved in all of this, as well. It’s all vibes, in other words. As Blues grow more secular and brown, Reds grow more Christian and white (and old.) This is where the Gay Scare we’re currently experiencing is coming from. There are MAGA Republicans who feel, by definition being a member of the LGBQ+ community is a “sin” and, as such, the way a long of Gen Z seem to see being gay as aspirational fills them with horror. These MAGA Republicans just want people to be filled with the Holy Spirit and stop messing around with people of the same sex.
And, this is a very important element to all of this — the reason why Republicans hate democracy is they KNOW that they’re losing a demographic battle and, as such, they would rather turn America into an autocratic white Christian ethnostate than do some soul searching and change their policies so they can win elections fair and square.
This is a point too often missed by smug Twitter liberals who seem to feel just being a keyboard warrior online is somehow going to change anything.
There Is No Endgame I’m not going to give you an pat solutions to the battle over being “woke.” There are none. All I got is the whole battle over “being woke” is a luxury of living in a peaceful, wealthy liberal democracy. When that is no longer the case — when things grow more….existential…then, lulz, the last thing we’re going to have time or energy for is fighting over the proper use of someone’s “pronouns.”
MAGA Nazis are such fucking crybabies. They are equal to some of the more extreme elements of the Trans movement when it comes to being willing to destroy everything in the name of “vibes.” Take, for instance, their reaction to the prospective new CEO of Twitter.
MAGA has some sort of vague sense of ideological purity that if they don’t get they freak the fuck out. They also love to gaslight when it comes to the issue of “free speech.” They want the absolute right to spread hate to the point that if you even bring up the idea of some of guardrails, they freak the fuck out. They see “free speech” as nothing more than an means to and end when it comes to establishing a fascist MAGA Nazi state.
The tragedy of the commons and all that.
The whole thing is completely fucking bonkers. It proves a point I’ve been making for some time — MAGA Nazis are politically ascendant and it could be that if we have a “National Divorce,” it will be Blues, not Reds who decide to serve papers.
I will note in passing that I’m worried about the next Republican president establishing an autocratic state using hard power, at the same time my conservative relatives — who I love dearly — are freaking out about “woke” corporations ruining their lives.
I’ve heard some chatter here and about that Phoebe Waller-Bridge might be tapped to write and direct the next James Bond movie. She already did a touch up of the No Time To Die script and she apparently really impressed the James Bond family in the process.
Given the dynamics of Hollywood, it’s at least within the realm of possibility that Waller-Bridge might not only write and direct the next James Bond, but BE James Bond. How they would pull this particular hattrick off, I don’t know, but that’s why they pay them the big bucks.
They did kill James Bond off in the last movie, so anything is possible. Even though Waller-Bridge would do a great job as James Bond, if a woman was James Bond every “anti-woke” crusader worth their talking head status on Fox News would freak the fuck out in a very, very public manner.
And, remember, there were rumors that the producers of the next Indy movie wanted to use time-travel to reboot the franchise so Waller-Bridge would be the next Indy. Apparently, at least according to the dubious YouTube movie grapevine, that idea has been shelved.
Anyway, it will be interesting how things develop going forward. Waller-Bridge definitely is a very talented woman and of all the people I could think of who might bring back the good olde days of campy James Bond updated for modern sensibilities, Waller-Bridge is definitely at the top of the list.
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