Tag: woke hollywood

A Review (Of Sorts) Of ‘Lightyear’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I finally finished Lightyear. But I’m drunk and lazy. So, this is going to be a “review” as done under those conditions. So, the key thing that pops out at me about this movie — which looks gorgeous — is how dull it is. It’s boring. I just didn’t feel any emotional connection to the story or the characters.

It was only because of that that I noticed how “woke” it is.

It was very, very woke.

Now, let me give you some context to all of this relative to me. I’m writing six (!) novels that I’m using as a creative outlet to rant at the top of my lungs about how much I fucking hate Trumplandia and, as well, the “woke cancel culture mob.” A pox on both your houses, as they say.

But I’m going to use subtext. I’m not going to deconstruct the white savior trope. Or have characters be gay just to make myself feel better. I’m not going to bang my political views over you, the reader, in other words. But the whole thing is designed to, at the end of six novels, layout why I fucking hate extremism from both sides of the aisle.

Anyway, back to Lightyear.

If it wasn’t so dull, I wouldn’t care how woke it was. If it had a good story that was compelling and didn’t have me thinking in the back of my mind, “Ahhh, of course, this is supposed to teach White People A Lesson About Relying Upon Brown People” because it was so dull, then that would be a whole different situation.

And, I’m sheepish to admit, I found myself rooting for Zerg. I agreed with his motivation. But, then, that might mean more about me not being the kid audience more than anything else.

Lightyear is not a bad movie. But it’s very much more a movie you might want to see on Disney+ as opposed to in a theatre.

‘Lightyear’ As a Woke Deconstruction of The ‘White Savior’ Trope

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Ok, I’m working my way through Disney’s “Lightyear” and I’ve reached a pretty woke aspect of this movie — its determination to attack the “White Savior” trope for the benefit of the plot. They even go so far as to say, at one point, “we don’t want us to save us, we want you to join us.” (Or something like that.)

Let me be clear — I’m anti-fascist and I fucking hate MAGA. But I’m not oblivious to what’s going on. Lightyear is, in a sense, woke propaganda for the benefits of the browning of America. I’m indifferent to the browning of America and definitely wouldn’t even notice this attack on the “White Savior” trope if the movie was…good.

But the movie isn’t very good. It’s boring. I just don’t care. I don’t know how much of that is it’s meant to be a kids’ movie and how much of it is, well, it really is just boring.

If Lightyear was a better movie, I would be so engaged by the plot that I wouldn’t have time to notice the “woke” elements of it all. But, lulz, nothing matters.

I suppose the point is — give me a good plot and I won’t care how woke your story is.

What Are They Up To With The New Indiana Jones Movie?

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It has been pretty obvious the last few Indiana Jones movies that they REALLY want to transition to a new actor as the central figure in the franchise. Harrison Ford is old and there’s going to come a point when if they’re going to continue with the movies someone is going to have take his place.

The New Indy?

And, yet, there’s a problem — the Indiana Jones franchise is very beloved and everyone thinks of Harrison Ford’s Indiana Jones when they think of “Indiana Jones.” So, they have to think of some way to keep going without him.

I heard a stray remark somewhere that the next Indy movie is about time travel. And given that Phoebe Waller-Bridge is involved it seems possible….that they might literally make her Indiana Jones via time travel? Maybe some sort of multiverse event happens and Indy is a girl instead of a boy at birth. Then our universe Indy meets this new version of himself in the past and not only does hilarity ensues but there’s a way for them to keep the brand name.

Of course there would be a huge uproar amongst conservatives at such an offense, but, lulz, there’s money to be made. And there are worst things to happen than to have Phoebe Waller-Bridge play a female Indy in a few movies. Though I still think she needs to play Dr. Susan Calvin, robot psychiatrist. She’s perfect for that role.

Anyway, this is all very much speculation. But something’s gotta happen unless they’re going to start using de-aging and deep fake technology to put Harrison Ford’s face on some other actor’s body. Strange things have happened in movies, I suppose.

The Case Against The ‘Woke’ Agenda


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Let me be clear — I still fucking hate the MAGA New Right with a white hot rage equal to the core of the sun. It’s just, at the moment, the center-Left (and the anti-MAGA movement in general) is doing itself no favors by being so fucking “woke.”

Let me explain.

Right now, the culture wars are all the MAGA New Right have. That’s it. They have a bunch of pithy slogans, racism, misogyny and a general hatred of the “Woke Agenda.” For all practical purposes, the Republican Party is running on fumes.

Republicans have no policies, no visioni and no agenda. So they turn to gerrymandering and voter suppression to win elections. And, when necessary, they wrap themselves up in a hatred of the misguided views of the Woke Agenda. Or, I won’t even call them “misguided.” Maybe “petty” and “hypersensitive” is a better way of putting it.

Whatever the exact nature of the Woke Agenda, the whole thing is corrosive. And that’s why the fucking Republicans love to wallow in their attacks of Critical Race Theory and “Cancel Culture.” They know it works. It works really well with the roughly 100,000 people across a few swing states that determine who is president every four years.

But it’s not like anything I say is going to change anything. The United States is tearing itself apart for a number of macro historical and political reasons and, in a sense, the “Woke Agenda” is the least of our worries. Autocracy is very, very popular within the Republican Party to the point that in 2024 – 2025 , we’re going to either slip peacefully unto autocracy or have a fucking civil war. A big one. A blood one. A nasty one.

Either way, autocracy or civil war, the Woke Era is going to come to a crashing in one way or another. And, honestly, I don’t even think that many people are “woke.” I think what’s going on in a lot of powerful people THINK that this or that woke thing will help them with young people when, in fact, I think if they just produced better content everyone would be happier.

There are no easy answers about any of this. The Right throws itself into the well of attacking wokness the moment it feels insecure about the possibility of winning an election through other, more overtly dubious means.

So, as I keep saying — we’re totally fucked. Enjoy these last few months of living in a semi-functioning Western democracy. In January 2023, everything is going to change. Things are going to get dark in the lead up to the complete clusterfuck of 2024 – 2025.

The ‘Woke’ Agenda Is Extremely Corrosive To American Politics


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Let me be clear — I fucking hate the MAGA New Right with a white hot rage. And think of the following as gentle advice to people I otherwise agree with. I’m far more anti-MAGA than I am liberal, progressive or Leftist. But I’m willing to make common cause with liberals, progressives and fuck, even Leftists if that’s what I have to do to destroy the MAGA New Right as an American political movement.

But we have to talk about how corrosive the “woke” agenda is to American politics. It’s corrosive because it’s being used as a political bludgeon by the fucking fascists to destroy any chance that Traditionalists will ever do what is necessary to save American democracy — make common cause with anti-MAGA forces.

In fact, in a way, I fear that ship has sailed. The MAGA New Right is ascendant and dominate when it comes to the hard power of passing laws. As it stands, in real terms, woke people are just annoying. But we have to address that a lot of well meaning Traditionalists feel that because of the “woke agenda” they risk being “canceled” — having their lives ruined — simply because they’re conservative.

This is a real concern on a personal basis for the conservative Traditionalists in my family. The idea of something they say or do being recorded then going viral and they having their lives destroyed is constantly at the forefront of their minds. This ever-present terror is one of the central reasons why they will never, ever make common cause with Anti-MAGA forces.

So, in a sense, we’re fucked. Fucked. Fucked. Fucked.

The two sides haven hardened their stances to the point that either we become an autocracy or we have a civil war. In either stance, I suspect the whole “woke agenda” will drift out of existence and into the aether. Being woke is a luxury of peace, prosperity and a properly functioning Western democracy with a civil society.

If you’re too busy either evading ICE or bombs, well, quibbling over your pronouns isn’t something that’s as at the front of your mind. Twitter is to blame for this cluckerfuck, to some extent.

Twitter always takes the most extreme position of any issue and then people on either side have that have to fight over it. I just don’t see any “normal” ending to all of this.

Things are going to get bumpy, staring the moment Republicans take the House and Senate in January 2023.

‘New Masculinity’ & The Zelensky Zeitgeist


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

American men have, for about a generation now, been derided and castigated as part of the monovalent “patriarchy.” It all kind of creeped up on us. Now, I’m coming at this issue as a rabid anti-MAGA New Right person. I fucking hate MAGA with a white hot rage, to the point that I’m writing five novels that lay out — in subtext — how and why I fucking hate the movement so much.

Zelensky

Anyway.

The point is –I’m very empathetic to women who want to “slay the patriarchy.” And, yet, the point could be made that “slay the patriarchy” is kind of like “defund the police.” It is a slogan that is easily used to get a crucial element of the body politic — “Traditionalists” to join the fucking MAGA New Right and destroy that precious commodity known as democracy.

And, remember, it is actually pretty rare for there to be a “vibe shift” in the way men perceive themselves. The thing that would tip off a vibe shift — how men appear — isn’t really applicable. Dudes are dudes. Either you’re wearing a suit to work and have power and influence or you don’t.

So, I’ve sat up and taken notice at how it’s beginning to look as though the standard, traditional masculinity of Ukraine’s president Volodymyr Zelensky is beginning to show results. What’s key about all of this is he doesn’t follow the current American media narrative about what it means to be masculine. If this was a Hollywood movie, Zelensky would be a woman struggling to run a nation while “slaying the patriarchy.”

But, surprise, he’s a dude doing traditional dude things in a traditional dude way. There’s no plot twist or flipping the script. It’s the traditional narrative of a man rising to the occasion on the world state in an effort to protect the collective home and hearth of his besieged nation.

So, we now have something of a cultural and historical question before us. Is this just a blip as part of a broader, macro trend towards traditional male values continuing to be disparaged or is there a change that we’re on the cusp of a “New Masculinity” that harkens back to the leadership of Lincoln, FDR and Churchill.

I honestly don’t know. For that to happen, I think we would have to actually have, like, uh, WW3. Only a major global war would force us to appricate the value of traditional male roles and concepts. I’ve already suggested something along these lines when I posited that our current “woke” culture will end around 2024 – 2025 when we decide as a nation if we’re going to be an autocracy or have a civil war.

So, I don’t know. It’s all very much up in the air. It could go either way.

A ‘Don’t Look Up’ Best Picture Win Would Be The Ultimate Triumph of ‘Woke Hollywood’



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Let me be clear — I’m very much willing to bend over backwards to give Don’t Look Up good press. It’s message is dear to my heart. The problem is, the movie itself sucks.

And, yet, here I am, listening to Vanity Fair’s Oscar podcast and they’re saying that Don’t Look Up could very well be in the running to win Best Picture. I get it. It makes sense. But, God, on a storytelling basis did that move suck. And, no, I haven’t gotten around to watching is all the way through yet.

I think some of that comes from how out of synch my expectations for the movie was. I went into it blind and I had some vague notion that it might be a modern day Network dealing with global climate change. But it just seemed way too busy sucking its own cock to be a Network-level movie. It was just annoying and irritating and I totally agree with its message.

What I saw of it was just too over the top. It seems to be trying too hard. It was too eager to make A Statement that it lost sight of telling a cogent, great story. If Don’t Look Up was a modern day Blue State Network, then I would love it and defend it against the slings and arrows of MAGA dipshits.

But, sadly, Don’t Look Up was just A Bad Movie on a storytelling level. It’s just irritating on a storytelling basis. It was all over the place, to the point that I didn’t care about the characters and didn’t want to watch it to the end despite being very receptive to its message. If it gets Best Picture despite that, then Woke Culture will really have flexed its power to the point that it will make me roll my eyes.

The thing about Network is it’s timeless. It’s such a great story that you could release it today and it would still be popular. Anyway, as I keep saying, I’m going to at least try to watch the movie all the way through and then re-reevaluate it.

How The ‘Woke’ Era Ends


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It’s self-evident that not enough people remember how much war really is hell. Over two generations of Americans have gone without the fear of a draft. As such, we’ve grown too fat and sassy.

We quibble about the stupidest shit. The Left, rather than making common cause with Liberals and NeverTrumpers to defeat the rise of fascism in America are willing to die on the hill of TERFs, pronouns and transgender kids. (Not that those aren’t all valid things to be concerned about in the modern world, but we do have honest-to-God fascists to deal with at the moment.)

My point is — woke culture is a luxury provided by decades of living in a stable, peaceful liberal democratic nation. The moment things grow existential for people in the center-Left, be it because we turn into a civil war or we transition into autocracy, all of the more annoying elements of being woke will simply burn off.

I keep thinking about how we seem to be at the end of an era. While I’m still not convinced that the Fourth Turning is a real thing — seems like a reversed engineered pseudoscience to me — we definitely are running on fumes as a nation. And that sense of running on fumes applies to both culture and politics. We’re at the end of one era (Turning?) and just about to begin another.

As such, it would make a lot of sense for everything to change one way or another between now and January 2025. If we turn into an autocracy, then there’s a good chance that Hollywood will decamp, en masse to Great Britain or Australia. I keep saying — Perth would be perfect for New Hollywood. It is in the middle of nowhere, but everyone I’ve ever met from Perth was extremely creative and interesting, just the type of creative pool of people that a moved Hollywood want to tap into.

And, God forbid we have a Second American Civil War, everything really would be thrown into the air. The nightmare endgame is the country doesn’t re-unite and we just bomb ourselves into the Stone Age for no damn reason other than Traditionalists are afraid of losing political power to secularists, scary brown people and economically liberated women.

Anyway. I just don’t see the Woke Era lasting beyond 2025. Something’s gotta give. When you’re worried about ICE blowing your head off or a race war because a civil war has broken out and WMD are being used, then, well, the issue of pronouns won’t be QUITE so urgent.

A Creative Conundrum



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I find developing and writing female characters a lot more fun because of how much of a challenge it is to do so as a man. I often also populate my work with POC including American Asians, etc. This is all well and good, but for the fact that at same time this thing that I’m told is expected in a modern writer is also, in itself, something that can cause problems.

‘Double dees, double deeze”

Because I’m a white “CIS” male.

So, there is something of a paradox. I’m suppose to have representation in my work, which I find myself doing anyway, and, yet, because I’m a white man, that, by definition, is a problem.

It can make the whole act of creation rather frustrating. All these rules I have to follow — which often have contradictory expectations — can cause you to grow angry at them. As an aside, I will note one of these rules that makes me seethe is the Bechdel Test, which I’ve heard described as originally proposed as a “half joke” in a fucking comic of all things.

So here I am, slaving away to write the best four novel series that I hope might be popular — especially with women readers — and I’m expected to have representation, but if I do have representation then it’s bad because I’m a white man writing from a female, or POC point of view.

What’s more, it’s now a fairly ridged ideology among some that these works also have to feature two women talking about something other than a man. I call bullshit.

The point is for me to tell the best story possible that entertain the audience for hours using only their imagination.

As such, you, as the writer, in my opinion, need to follow your truth north. If you’re a white “CIS” male, you just can’t win with some people. By definition, they don’t like you and don’t like anything you produce. It’s enough to make me want to write under an assumed identity or something. I’m only half-joking, as it were.

Anyway. All I can do is try my best to flesh out my vision on the page and see what happens.

9/11, Negative Polarization & Why Superhero Movies Continue To Be Popular


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Traditionally, at least within my own mind, superhero movies have been popular the last 20 years because of the lingering collective trauma of 9/11. We all just want a superhero to save the day that fateful moment in time and make the bad memories go away.

Given that it’s been 20 years since 9/11 now, I think it’s time to move on. And, yet, superhero movies now play a different roll — their value free nature make them the perfect tentpole move. Negative polarization has so consumed every aspect of American life that the idea of watching a movie that doesn’t preach to us and simply tells the story of a bunch of caped crusaders is very appealing to average person.

At the moment, it seems as though you have big tentpole movies and little woke movies that make you feel bad for not being progressive enough. (I still can’t get over being shamed into seeing Booksmart. I still fucking hate that fucking movie. Give me Heathers instead, any day.)

But, what sucks is we’re kind of stuck in a cultural holding pattern now. It does make you wonder what will come next. I honestly don’t know. I would like to think that at some point a random movie will be a huge hit — like The Matrix way back when — and that, in itself, will herald a New Age of movies that don’t involve people wearing masks and running around in Spandex.