The Advent of New Cultural Era?

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It definitely seems as though we’re — a last — experiencing something of a vibe shift. There are a number of new musical acts that are actually, well, good. There’s IDLES, So Good, Chappell Roan and Olivia Rodrigo just to name a few who are really interesting and actually make music that serve the audience really well.

Another thing I’ve noticed is a growing number of young people on Tik-Tok doing “fit checks” where they look like a person from between 1968 and 1972. I haven’t seen anyone dressing like this out in the wild, but everything old is new again, so it seems possible that Tik-Tok might cause these isolated instances to spread across the country.

Chappell Roan
At the same time, technology is also lurching forward with the rise of AI and the Apple Vision Pro.

Put all these developments together and it definitely seems that we’re on the cusp of leaving the 20-odd year Post-911 era. A lot will depend on, of course, what happens with the election.

If Trump wins, there’s a good chance that there could be a rather amazing, severe break with the past one way or another. Either because we become a full blow MAGA Nazi autocracy, or, oh boy, we depose Trump then have a civil war because Red States get mad and leave the Union in a huff.

But it does seem as though the post-911 era is fading, if nothing else. The confluence of tech change along with cultural changes definitely seems to indicate that this is the case.

While I Love Olivia Rodrigo’s ‘Vampire,’ She May Get Sued Over It

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Given how sue happy the music industry is of late, let’s listen to these three songs and see what you think.

I know you can’t copyright a chord progression, but….the these three songs — especially at the beginning — seem very, very, very similar. The Hollies have already sued Radiohead over Creep, it could be that BOTH The Hollies AND Radiohead will sue Ms. Rodrigo over Vampire.

Or maybe not. Maybe I’m just old and can see the influences in modern songs that are so conspicuous as to be distracting.

The Time Is Ripe For The Return Of ‘The Nevermind Man’


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The band Garbage is one of my favorites. And, as I understand it, the band is the brain child of Butch Vig. I keep ranting about the need for him to produce someone like Dua Lipa or Olivia Rodrigo or even Taylor Swift, but lulz, no one listens to me.

But I’m frustrated AGAIN and at how bad modern pop music, so you get this. This happens every once in awhile. Something is warping modern pop music to make it so bad. Now, of course, it’s possible that I’m just old. But it is notable that what I feel would otherwise be happening — the return of pop rock in the guise of something akin to NeoNew Wave, isn’t happening.

All I got is rap is sucking up all the male creative energy that would otherwise be giving the momentum to a general pop rock revival? Because rap is far more creative an interesting than anything else going on, the best minds in music gravitate towards listening to and producing rap music instead of the more white-oriented New Wave?

Because right now, there is no organized genre for people who like pop rock. It’s all these little deep echoes of a by gone era that pop out here and there. No one has the guts to put out a Neo New Wave (Rona Rock) album that might fail horrible because it’s too hip for the room.

But if there was one person who could pull it off, at least on the producer side, it’s Butch Vig. Too bad this will never, ever happen.

Hey, Olivia Rodrigo, Wanna Change The World?


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I only write about this because I’m old and annoyed with modern music. The more I mull Olivia Rodrigo’s music in my mind, the more it seems just one or two ticks away from simply being New Wave. Now, Miley Cyrus has been dabbling in covering New Wave music, but she screams the songs at the top of her lungs, which kind of defeats the purpose.

Olivia Rodrigo / The Internet

The thing about Olivia Rodrigo is, her mental bolts seem to be on a lot more tighter than bonkers Ms. Cyrus, so I could easily see any number of big artists or producers from the late 70s or early 80s working with her to produce a literal New Wave album. Given how popular she is, it could potentially not only be a huge album, it could maybe be the thing to introduce Xenials to the “good music” of my youth.

Or not. No one listens to me.

‘The Dress’ Or, Of Rubes & Boobs


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

There’s a sexxy little black dress that a number of high profile women have come to wear at their high profile events. The Dress is just low cut enough that some tape has to be involved if these lovely women in question don’t want to pop out of their bodice.

Olivia Rodrigo is the most notable example of a famous woman wearing The Dress because she’s just barely 18. This led to much consternation on Tik-Tok by her well meaning fans who have gone to elaborate lengths to ascribe Ms. Rodrigo wearing The Dress to some nefarious plot of adults who just wanted to see her tits.

The Dress.

These Tik-Tokers point to a clip where Ms. Rodrigo is seen turning for a moment to talk to her stylist before turning around again for the press. Now, what *I* think was happening was not that she was upset with the dress, but she was feeling a little insecure that her boobs were on the verge of popping out and she didn’t want a wardrobe malfunction.

The thing I have to point out is — while I’m not a woman so I don’t know, I do know enough about history, status and women to tell that for some reason wealthy women have a different relationship to their boobs than poorer women do. For wealthy women, having the odd nipslip here or there is a flex. I will suggest you throw in how age works into all of this as well. Older women have zero fucks left and, for them, a bit of conspicuous T&A in public now and again makes them feel sexxy. (I presume.) And, even more importantly, I’m thinking in extremely broad terms.

There are plenty of older, wealthy women who are rather chaste –Alexa Chung, Julia Roberts and Emma Stone being prime examples of this.

But I’m a CIS white male who likes seeing boobs, so fuck you. (Wink)

The Reason Why Olivia Rodrigo Wore That Dress


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

While everyone is busy clutching their pearls that a gorgeous bombshell like Olivia Rodrigo might wear a stunning dress at just 18, they’re all missing the point: that girl wants to star in Hollywood movies.

The reason why I say this — to what event did she wear a dress that was sure to catch a significant amount of attention? The opening of the Academy Museum. So, spare me all your anguish over how reveling the dress was. Ms. Rodrigo knew what she was doing.

The Dress had a number of purposes. One was to just catch people’s attention. Another was to suggest, in a meta-way, that she is a grown up now and prepared to perform adult roles in major Hollywood movies. She probably is well aware that Dua Lipa is set to start in a major movie soon and she wants to be nipping at her heels, careerwise.

Anyway, what do I know.

In Defense Of Olivia Rodrigo


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

At the risk of being a dirty old man, I would like to take a moment to defend Olivia Rodrigo wearing a pretty stunning dress at the recent opening of the Academy Museum. (I know, I know, what else am I going to say?)

The argument is, she’s just barely 18 and, as such, for her to wear such a dress is for her, by definition, to be unduly sexualize. I validate that argument, and, yet, I have to take issue with it. Your typical fashion model walking the runways is somewhere in the 14-17 age range and some of the clothes they wear are eye-popping.

Holy cow, Olivia Rodrigo! / Internet image.

The dress in question is gorgeous as is she and given she is 18 and can pull it off, I say go for it. She’s gorgeous enough that she could easily walk the catwalk and, as such, fall within the context of wearing provocative clothing for her age. If anything, I would be more concern about brunette-loving Pete Davidson swooping in and dating her more than I would how provocative the dress is.

Or, put another way, from a photographic standpoint, the pictures I’ve seen of her in that dress are incredible. I say this as someone is regularly rattled by how underage Millie Bobby Brown really is unduly sexualized for her age and, by the way, what’s up with her and Drake?

Again, I don’t mean to come off as a dirty old man. But, I guess, in the eyes of some, I, by definition, am.

Yes, Tik-Tok, People Want To Dance — Just Not To Fucking Disco


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Maybe it’s because it’s a song-and-dance app, but I’ve seen a lot of disco-themed dancing on Tik-Tok of late. I generally fucking hate most disco because I’m more of a dance pop rock person. I like at least a bit of edge to what I listen — or dance — to. I’m well aware of the meta-social-gender aspect of how great and wonderful the Age of Disco was because the patriarchy was slayed and everyone was free to be gay and do coke off a twink’s ass.

Ok, I get it. And that’s a valid argument –I still fucking hate most disco.

I want music that’s got a beat and you can dance to it — but of the pop rock variety. We’ve had almost 20 years of shitty music that inhabits a vague space known as “Adult Contemporary.” It’s bland, corporate and non-threatening. And, yet, oddly enough, in just the last few years, it’s clear that a number of huge artists are hot on the trail of The New Sound.

For instance, Miley Cyrus keeps covering old rock and New Wave chestnuts as if she knows what she wants to sing — but she can’t find it in modern music. Her latest album is soooo close to what I imagine Rona Rock, the New Sound, would be like.

Meanwhile, Olivia Rodrigo is doing something similar. Her debut album has a lot of wink and nod references to New Wave music. And, yet, it’s still a pretty safe album. It’s pretty much just a pop album full of songs that could be safely played next to an Ariana Grande song on existing Top 40 radio.

It’s Chvrches’ “Screen Violence” album that is exactly what I’ve been looking for. It’s an album that is essentially a throwback to the good old days of dance pop rock by way of Chvrches synth stylings.

More of this!

But the point is — all I would need is the first 10 seconds of “How Not To Drown” and I would play it at Nori in Seoul on a Friday night in late 2006. (Another song from that album, “Nightmares” is a banger, too.) And I think if Miley Cyrus and Olivia Rodrigo swerved in that direction with their next albums that it would be a two-fer: old farts like me would love and the youngins who know jackshit about music produced before cellphones would also sit up an take notice.

And, yet, absolutely no one listens to me.

Rona Rock: Chvrches’ ‘How Not To Drown’ Is A Bop


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m natively good at a few things. Among them is, apparently, being a pop rock DJ. Just in the last few months, I’ve started to notice an uptick in the type of music I would have played at Nori in Seoul. I call it “Rona Rock” because, well, lulz, that sounds cool.

But the song that hits the sweet spot for a good tune that I would have played at Nori the moment I heard it is Chvrches’ new song “How Not To Drown.” It’s definitely got that pop rock vibe to it. The type of song that you could play in primetime on a Friday night at the bar and people might endup dancing on the tables before it was over with — especially if it was the first time they had heard it and they really liked it.

It’s very danceable and it has that thump-thump-thump bass needed to get people out shaking their grove thang.

Source: Internet

The thing I would note is — whatever Chvrches is doing, they need to sprinkle it in the drinks of Olivia Rodrigo and Miley Cyrus. “How Not To Drown” is exactly the “new sound” those two women seem to be struggling to discover. It’s pop rock, people! People want to dance to rock music! Why is this so hard for the corporate shills of the modern music industry to understand?

That The Cure’s Robert Smith is involved in “How Not To Drown” is a testament to exactly what I’m talking about. It pains me to no end that Olivia Rodrigo and Miley Cyrus and thrashing about, looking for the New Sound and they probably won’t notice that Chvrches has found it.

‘Rona Rock:’ I’ve Seen The Face Of Pop Rock And Its Name Is Olivia Rodrigo


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’ve written at length about this before, but Olivia Rodrigo’s release of her album “sour” has me thinking about it again — now that the United States is getting out of the pandemic, maybe it’s time for pop rock to return.

I call this neo-pop rock, “Rona Rock.”

Let me give you some context. There are millions of old farts like me who love rock that has a beat and you can dance to. Maybe a few dozen million. And, at the moment, they are forced to listen to “classic rock.” Not a lot of new pop rock is coming out and that which is coming out is almost exclusively Miley Cyrus doing covers of old pop rock songs.

Sour is so close to being a traditional pop rock album. It still, however, lacks the edge of a true pop rock album. It’s more a POP rock album. So it seems to me that of all the popular acts out there that Rodrigo is the most likely to come out with an album produced by someone like Butch Vig of Nirvana’s “Heart Shape Box” and the band Garbage.

In fact, I would go so far as to say if Rodrigo did go that route that a lot of GenZ people would experience a significant amount of musical future shock. They wouldn’t know what hit’em.

There is another, safer, direction that Rodrigo could go that would be almost just as good — the Nelly Furtado option of teaming up with someone like Timbaland. The album they did together is one of my favorites of the Before Times when some form of pop rock still existed.

And, yet, I doubt this will happen in any way. It’s too risky for an established act to make such an abrupt break with existing musical tastes. If my dream of “Rona Rock” is going to happen, it’s going to happen because a pop rock song becomes unexpectedly popular on Tik-Tok.