Tag: Fuck You MAGA

Sen. Rand Paul’s Craven Desire To Out The Whistleblower Is Growing Surreal

Shelton Bumgarner

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

What the fuck is wrong with Sen. Rand Paul? Leaving aside why an avowed libertarian would be such a fucking suckup to Trump, what does he honestly expect will happen if we get the Whistleblower’s name? (We will get it sooner rather than later, but, still.)

All I got is on the face of it, he thinks on a political level it significantly helps Trump’s case because the name not only gives Republicans built-in talking points, but they can pivot to the Whistleblower’s connections to Joe Biden and Susan Rice whenever the issue of Trump’s many impeach-and-convict crimes come up in conversations with reporters. If you’re exclusively messaging the fucking racist, misogynistic dipshit MAGA people who love fascism and liberal tears, then you can, at least in your own Republican Senator mind, excuse Trump’s crimes against the Constitution because, well, the person who reported them is not a MAGA person. On a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very stupid level — like date your sister stupid level — I guess if you’re a MAGA person you can spooge your pants now that the vast Deep State Conspiracy has been exposed….for simply pointing out that Trump’s “perfect phone call” actually showed a massive, historic abuse of power.

But, lulz. If you’re MAGA you hate black people and women. You hate America and democracy. All you care about power and money and sucking Trump’s political cock. So you can delude yourself into thinking everyone else will fall for this political messaging that helps you get to sleep at night.

I guess it’s at least possible this might happen. I guess.

There’s a real danger, however, that things may careen out of control. There may be violence direct against the Whistleblower on the part of MAGA. What political objectives this might accomplish are something of a mystery to me. But I guess having blood on your hands will somehow…prove to Godless pinko liberals that MAGA has the best interests of America at heart?

I don’t know. Just be careful what you wish for, MAGA. Americans don’t abide by political violence. What may seem like a great idea at first may not work out quite the way you expect it.

Why The Racist, Misogynist Fascist MAGA Asshats Want The Whistleblower To Testify In Person So Bad

Now what.
Shelton Bumgarner

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Trump’s going all in on having the Whistleblower come forth personally and testify in public — even though Trump himself was such a wussy he wouldn’t give Mueller in-person answers to his questions. But, then, hypocrisy is very on-brand for MAGA, so there you go.

Here are my person hot takes on why Trump’s so wrapped up in this idea of being able to see his foe on TV testifying in person before Congress.

They Want A Mueller Moment
What MAGA shitheads took away from Mueller’s “poor optics” during his testimony before Congress was they have a chance of winning not on the facts but because we live in a media age and how something plays on TV is far more important than anything else. Even though we have enough to impeach and convict Trump as it is — they think if they can only get the Whistleblower in front of Lindsey Graham for 11 hours, all their troubles will go away.

They Want To ‘Kavanaugh’ Him
MAGA fuckwits want to do to the Whistleblower what they feel was done to Justice Kavanaugh. They want to swap out policy differences for facts, however. They want to prove a point — at least in their own minds — that the only reason why Democrats were so hard on Kavanaugh is they did not have politics on their side so they played dirty. Given that Republicans hate that someone may have bested them at their own ratfucking (at least in their own minds) they have a near-sexual craving to repay the favor to Democrats. If they can get women screaming at Democrat Senators in elevators over some personal issue in the Whistleblower’s past, dipshit traitor Republicans will cackle themselves to sleep at night.

They Want To Focus Their Hate On Him Personally
This is kind of the darkest part of all of this. This is the worst case scenario. They are so wrapped up in their own overheated, overwrought rhetoric that they are blinded to what might happen if someone took it the wrong way and physically harmed the Whistleblower. (Hint — it would be bad politics, to say the least.) But in the moment, they don’t care. They have bloodlust at this point and when it sinks in what a horrific mistake they’ve made, it will be far, far too late. They will pontificate on how Trump was “just joking” and he “can’t be held responsible” for the actions of a mentally-ill person, but they will say in the same fucking breath that OBVIOUSLY we have to stop the impeachment process because people are dying.

Trump Whistleblower Pandamonium Cheat Sheet

Truth.
Shelton Bumgarner

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Right now, deep in the dark bowls of the fascist Republican Party, an army of oppo men are digging through the bio of the Trump whistleblower. They know they have a deadline — when the House has its first serious impeachment vote.

There goal is to end stop the vote altogether or to blunt its impact in the eyes of the base.

So, here’s what to look for today.

— Does Trump just…tweet it out?
Does he get really excited and simply start ranting about the poor guy the moment he finds out who it is? He doesn’t care that it’s against the law to do so, he may simply start ranting about it without even thinking about it. Remember, all that matters is power for power’s sake and messaging the base. Everyone, and everything, else can fuck off.

— How cocky are House Republicans today?
The reason why I think the name is going to pop out far sooner today than we realize is it gives House Republicans something to pivot to whenever they’re asked about Trump’s many, many, MANY crimes. So, they’re going to either be really cocky or they’re going to be chomping at the bit to talk about the guy…which is why I think Trump’s going to make it easy for them to do it. Things may grow extremely surreal when what Republicans think is going to happen — that impeachment comes to a grinding halt — does not, in fact, happen.

— The public’s reaction
Usually, it takes 24 hours for us to be able to gauge the public’s reaction. There’s a chance that Nancy Pelosi may sense some nervousness in her caucus and delay the vote — and maybe never even hold it. It will be just like after the “bad optics” of Mueller’s testimony . We’ll know Trump’s a criminal but there simply won’t be the political will to do anything about it….AGAIN. It may be she chokes for no other reason than she needs time to whip her caucus to keep going.

And, just for the record, if you’re some sort of dipshit fuck face MAGA person reading this gleefully — fuck you, you fucking piece of shit.