Sigh. Living In Oblivion

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Sometimes, living in oblivion is pretty cool because I can say anything I like an absolutely no one — outside of some stalkers or haters (wink) — give a shit. So, with that in mind, hopefully I can talk about my former celebrity crush Alexa Chung without being pounced on.

A very long time ago now, I was a *little* obsessed with Ms. Chung. But that was a long time ago and I only bring her up because I keep getting pushed her Instagram Reels. This has brought her to the forefront of my mind again.

She definitely my type, even if she’s a bit vacuous. She’s got a really sharp wit, which is very intellectually stimulating. But of late, her “glow” as an “It Girl” seems to have faded significantly with the likes of Emma Chamberlain taking her place.

Anyway. As I mentioned, absolutely no one — outside of the usual suspects — give a shit about me or what I have to say.

Finally, Something ‘Fun Interesting’ Has Happened To Me (Updated)

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m living in oblivion at the moment while I struggle with my first novel and, as such, it doesn’t take a lot to make my day. I’m always on the lookout for something interesting that gives me something to think about where no gets hurt. I call this a “fun interesting” event.

Me in Seoul when I was young and cute.

Well, would you believe that low-key celebrity crush Jen Selter responded to me on Tik-Tok with a Telegram channel where I could purportedly talk to her? At first I was very reluctant to look into this, but then the response was deleted, which really piqued my interest.

So, I looked the Telegram channel up and said “Hello?” According to Telegram, someone has seen what I wrote. It’s all very curious. I find Ms. Selter extremely attractive — but, then I’m also living in abject poverty at the moment, so lulz. But, honestly, I’ve reached an age where I’m so blase and jaded that it takes a lot to get me engaged.

I’m EXTREMELY FLATTERED at the possibility that Ms. Selter might have taken the time to allow me to contact her directly…and…yet…meh? Giving it some thought, I think what may have caught her attention is I wrote some micropoetry using her tweets as a prompt.

That makes a lot of sense.

Ok, I understand what’s going on now. Baring her actually responding to my Telegram message….God speed, Ms. Selter.

Update:
In yet more proof that I’m a nobody, I actually did go to the Telegram account for Selter and talk to “her.” I appears it was all a catfishing operation to sell crypto. What makes this so comical is how bad it was. I *think* Ms. Selter has some people somewhere in the world that she’s farmed her Telegram account out to who interact with idiots like me as if they are her. They try to sell you crypto. Once it became clear that something very strange was going on — why did “she” contact me in the middle of the night and not respond with native-like English? — I couldn’t figure out if it was a bot or a person I was talking to.

Now, given some reflection, I think it was a person whose first language was not English.

Way to lose a fan, Jen Selter.