Month: January 2022

Could Emily Ratajkowski Run For Office?


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I only mention this because so many fucking people got boners and went looking for sexxy AOC bikini snaps when she went to Miami. This only caught my attention because my Webstats exploded with people who apparently can’t read — I was talking about how the picture DON’ T EXIST you morons. (wink.)

So, we come to Emily Ratajkowski. She is, in my opinion, one of the best looking women in the world. Maybe, at the moment, she is THE best looking woman in the world. And she’s been a nude model a whole lot. She’s very sex positive and made a name of herself being naked a lot.

But this brings us to another element of Ms. Ratajkowski — she’s actually fairly smart and self-aware. (To a certain extent.) So much so that occasionally she’ll make rumblings of her frustration over how difficult it would be for someone like herself to run for office given that we’ve all see her naughty bits.

Which leads to the question — if a woman at any point in her life is recorded being naked does that, by definition, exclude her from running for office?

For the time being, yes. But once Baby Boomers finally collectively fucking drop dead, there’s a chance that Xennials will be far more open to having seen the T&A of their favorite pol for no other reason than so many women will have been nude on the Internet at some point that is will grow moot. We’ll all just have to accept that women — gasp — are human and women they’re young, they are way too casual (at times) with who they show their naughty bits to.

So, the case could be made that starting around 2045, that someone like Ratajkowski probably could run for office and win and no one would blink an eye.

How Do You Compete Against Racist MAGA Fascists In A Failing Democracy?


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

America faces a very existential crisis — is the United States a “constitutional republic” or a democracy? Now, for those of you playing the home game, it’s quite clear what the answer is: it’s both.

And, yet, here were are.

The center-Right, afraid of scary brown people and liberated women, want to play our creaking Constitution like a xylophone so they can establish autocratic white Christian rule. Instead of doing the hard work of democracy — figuring out why their policies are so unpopular — they are tripling down on their existing hated policies and destroying our democracy while they’re at it.

And, as such, the United States finds itself in something of a pickle.

We’re careening towards a very dark situation in 2024 – 2025 where the issue of what America is will come to the forefront of all our minds with there is a very strong possibility that using the more obscure portions of the Constitution, Republicans will establish permanent white minority rule. And that will be that.

Or not.

There is a small chance of either a military junta being established or a full blown civil war between seceding Blue States and Red States who want to destroy Blue States once and for all. In that case, we would bomb ourselves into oblivion and be thrust into a very dark, uncertain future.

But the issue remains — Republicans are united in their desire to establish a fascist state in the United States, while too often the center-Left has its head so far up its ass that it’s too busy expecting some sort of “boom” to save us. Trump and the fascists are above the law and it’s comical that major Twitter liberal accounts like Mueller, She Wrote would STILL breathlessly report this or that “development” as if it means jackshit.

No one is going to save us. The system isn’t working. It will not work. We’re on our own. Gird your loins for a fucking political catastrophe of some sort between now January 2025.

Why There Will Be A Second American Civil War


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

If there is another civil war, it will happen because of a severe difference in opinion about what the United States is. The center Right thinks the United States is a Constitutional Republic and, as such, if they fuck with it enough and establish white minority rule, then fuck you. They throw around things like “mob rule” and “even de Tocqueville warned against democracy.”

Meanwhile, the center-Left believes that while the United States IS a Constitutional Republic, it is a de facto Western democracy and a wide ranging set of norms have developed over the years to facilitate a government “by the people, of the people and for the people.”

So, if there is a civil war — and it’s very possible there won’t be and we’ll just slip peacefully into autocracy — at its core it will be because of that difference of opinion. And that difference of opinion comes from white Christians freaking out about the browning and secularization of America. They see the Constitution not as a way to express the will of the people, but a firebreak against the loss of white power on a macro basis.

Now, the dumb thing of all of this is, obviously, that there are any number of scenarios whereby the center-Right gets everything it wants without resorting to violence. So, it would be a huge self-own on the part of the center-Right if they decided to force the issue and cause Blue States to leave the Union which, in turn, would start a civil war where the most powerful nation in the world bombs itself into the Stone Age.

I don’t think one can process at the moment how fucking insane a Second American Civil War would be. Everything would collapse, not just in the United States by the entire world. And there’s no assurance that it would ever be put back together.

Anyway, the point is — gird your loins. The next few years will grow more and more bumpy until they reach a potentially astonishing climax around January 2025.

Y’all Motherfuckers Thirsty For AOC


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Ugh. Obviously, every horny toad in America had the same idea as I did when they learned AOC was in Miami — did she walk around in a little bikini at some point and did TMZ get the sexxy snaps?

AOC, fully clothed.

This is so dumb because it shows how dumb FOX New Nation is. They’re projecting. They’re thinking with their ding-dong. They see AOC as some sort of libertine progressive-liberal who OBVIOUSLY with run around with no clothes on in Miami given the opportunity.

Fuck those guys. Give me a break.

Now, watch some pictures of her in a bikini leak just as I write that. I would find that hilarious, but there would be a darker significance to it — her political career would probably be ruined. (Which, of course, is why FOX News Nation shitheads have such a boner to find them.)

I have to give the horny Right Wing guys credit, though, they sure are pretty brazen in their hypocrisy.

The Fall Of The Second American Republic


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

America is at a crossroads. The chief issue of the day is how do you have a functioning republic when one of your two major political parties sees the “constitutional republic” not as a way to have a functioning Western democracy but as an excuse for minority rule?

The answer is, of course, you don’t.

Either you slide peacefully into autocracy, have a military junta or descend into civil war.

But the Second American Republic, the one Lincoln gave his life to found, is in its twilight years. No later than January 2025, it will come to an end one way or another. We will either simply shrug and become an autocracy or we will fucking bomb ourselves into fucking oblivion over cancel culture and CRT.

And, as I keep saying, I just don’t know which option we will chose, which door we will open. It really could go either way at this point. The Right has become so bloodthirsty and so in need of sucking its own cock that they could self-own and start a civil war that they don’t need to get what they want.

It’s all very stupid.

And, yet, that’s where we’re headed. The right feels as those the center-Left is “forcing” them to radicalize. Talk about blaming the victim! Anyway, as I keep saying, it’s over. Either we become an autocracy or we have a civil war and maybe, just maybe, found a Third Republic.

But one thing is for sure — Lincoln’s Second Republic is on its last legs.