Month: February 2021

Now, To Distract Myself


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The novel is going really well, but for one thing — I threw out the beginning AGAIN — and now I have to reimagine parts of it AGAIN so I have what I want: about 50 scenes in the first act.

This is when I need to distract myself. I have a little bit of slack in the process of development — like, 24 hours, so I think I’m going to read a lot now while I cogitate on how to think up some scenes that are original and not one of the many, many spare scenes I have floating around in my mind that I often plop into the plot as need be when I grow desperate.

But, as I said, things are getting better. A lot better. The biggest issue has been that since I’m working in a vacuum — and don’t have a wife or girlfriend to be my “reader” — that sometimes I have all these lead-up scenes that aren’t, really, needed. Then I cut them, the story gets stronger, but everything has, in a sense, been thrown up in the air and I have to account for the changes in the outline I have.

What happens at these points is I grow rather frazzled. The only way to chill out mentally is think about something, anything other than the novel for a few hours (or if it’s a weekend, a few days.)

But one interesting that is happening is I both find myself reluctant to talk about the novel as I grow more serious about it and I also find pretty much anything else but the novel pointless. If I have something to say, the novel gives me more than enough words to say it using subtext, if nothing else.

And, yet, out of habit and a need to let of some steam, I may do some extra writing on this blog for the next day or so. Or not. I don’t know. I really need to reflect on life — and the novel — some before I throw myself back into it tomorrow afternoon.

Apparently, Members of The MSM Think I’m Some Sort of Internet Crank


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The only reason why this is even important is I’m working on a novel. I worry that my years of being both “delusional and stupid” on the Internet will come back to haunt me when I approach gatekeepers about maybe buying my novel. The novel itself is turning out to be really good.

My fear is that even if all things being equal the actual artistic work is good-to-great that gatekeepers will do due diligence on my Internet production and think I’m some sort of deranged crank.

This has already happened, several times, when people use the Internet Archive to look at this site as they do due diligence on me after I contact them in one way or another for help with the novel. They take one look at my content and think I’m just a kook.

It’s just annoying.

It shouldn’t matter if I’m a kook or not — if I produce art that is mainstream and people may want to buy, buy my novel on its merits, not on some strange idea that may have crossed my mind over the years. It’s all very, very frustrating.

But, in a sense, I can’t help who I am. To thyself be true, as they say. I tried to be “normal” about 25 years ago and it didn’t go too well. I will admit that I AM something of a kook — but, as the late Annie Shapiro said of me, I’m a “delusional jerk with a good heart.”

I don’t expect to ever be “professional” in the traditional sense ever again in my life, so I’d at least like to be judged by the metrics of a creative person, not some stuffy professional.

I have no idea if anyone will listen to my plea on this one.

Of ‘Cancel Culture’

Shelt Garner

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The issue for me is, does cancel culture even exist? I would say, in real terms — no. So many people who should be “canceled” never are. In fact, it can get so bad when a white male is involved that you’re surprised when someone who has a cannibalism fetish scandal has to face any sort of accountability.

Or, let me put it to you this way — if “cancel culture” does, in fact, exist, are we really prepared to give power to deranged would-be autocrats like Donald Trump in an effort to rid ourselves of it? It seems to me that “cancel culture” is part of a broader problem — the MAGA Right longs for a time when women and minorities “knew their place” and, as such, white men could do whatever the fuck they wanted. It helped that this was also a moment in time when an white man without a college education could support a family of five on his income and his income alone. Such men, who are, in a real sense, the backbone of any liberal democracy now feel “stuffed” as the book title says.

They feel fucked over.

Because the liberal-progressive movement hasn’t figured out how to bridge the gap between Modern America and the America of when it was “great” for white men without a college education…we’re in the situation we’re in right now. And, honestly, I don’t see what we can do about it.

As I keep saying, either we have a revolution / civil war in about four years, or we turn into an autocracy. The end game for people who rant about “cancel culture” is to be in a position to “cancel” anyone who objects to any policy they may want to implement. People who rant about “cancel culture” ultimately will make the issue moot because the people who would otherwise be “canceled” are going to be the ones throwing people into ICE camps, never to be seen again.

Or, put another way, enjoy the next few years of liberal democracy. We’re totally fucked. The end is coming for the America that we know now. People like me are going to be rounded up, put in ICE camps and probably murdered in cold blood.

Either get out of the country while you can, be prepared to submit to Big Brother, or be willing to risk your “life and scared honor” to what you believe in when the Bad Guys finally win.

Things Are Going Well Right Now With The Novel


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

While plenty can still go wrong, I’m quite pleased with the state of the novel right now. The thing that makes me so pleased is I’ve managed to come up with scene after scene that has a reason for existence and is interesting.

And it’s all powered by my lingering rage over the Trump Era. For a moment after Trump left office, I thought I might lose that creative energy. But it I’ve managed to bounce back very quickly. My rage against Trumplandia is now white hot against because I know it’s not going anywhere. It’s going to come back with a force the second Trump is wrongly acquitted by the Senate.

So, I’m going to push forward. I’m working on the assumption that the very reason why I wanted to write a novel in the first place — to rage against Trumplandia — is still there, just the context is different. I always wanted this novel to be very much a part of the zeitgeist so what has happened the infrastructure for the novel so why not just use it.

As such, I’m quite pleased.

There’s a lot ahead of me in this project. There’s a lot I don’t know, like how far I can get through this project before it all grinds to a halt because it’s obvious that I can’t get past the gatekeepers.

But we’ll see. I’m really pleased with this novel. For the time being, I’m going continue to allow myself to be delusional.

The Second American Civil War of 2024-2025


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It’s pretty obvious that America is tearing itself apart. The successful election of Joe Biden in 2020 simply punted down the road a crisis that is brewing in the American political system. For historical context a lot of the shit that happened in 2020 with Republicans happened to a far lesser extent with Democrats in 2016 and so it’s logical to assume a similar problem will — only worse — will happen one way or another in 2024.

Here are some reasons why we will have a civil war.

  1. Republicans have come to glorify political violence
    Something you see a lot these days within the bullshit echo chamber of the MAGA New Right is the belief that because “liberals won’t leave us alone” that they are being “driven” to extremism. There’s a lot of leading not-so-vague talk as to what all this would ultimately mean. But it’s clear that for a number of “thought leaders” within the MAGA New Right that they have accepted that at some point in the future, they’re going to have to resort to violence to get what they want.
  2. Republicans no longer believe in democracy
    It is now clear that like any good fascists, Republicans no longer believe in democracy unless it’s for the specific purpose of gaining and keeping power. This view of the system they’re supposed to a part of leads them do extremely destabilizing things that help push the country to the brink.
  3. Trump 2024
    Just Trump being the 2024 nominee would, in itself, be enough to cause a civil war at some point in late 2024 – early 2025. He just has a special knack for “owning the libs” in such a way that if he stole in 2024 election and said the “quiet part outloud” that Blue States would grow so enraged that it would be they, not Red States, that left the Union and caused a Second Civil War. But Ron DeSantis is polling exceptionally well at the moment, so either Trump politically shivs him at some point, or he co-ops him, making him his VP, opening the door to DeSantis becoming America’s Putin at some point down the road a little bit.
  4. Steve K Bannon.
    Bannon and his toadies are actively working to destroy the framework that we use to administer free and fair elections. So, it’s very easy to imagine a situation where this gambit works in ways that Trump himself is too idiotic to pull off personally and it will be so egregious that, again, Blue States leave the Union and we have a Second American Civil War.
  5. Extreme negative polarization
    We’re in for a bump four or so years, no matter what, because negative polarization, on a systemic level, has reached a critical mass. When one of your political parties is fascist and would rather crash the global economy instead of even appear to work for the good of the nation — you got a problem.
  6. A lack of shared values
    As the big blow up on Twitter in the last 24 hours about a Stephen Colbert song and dance gag about getting vaccinated proves — we can’t even agree on what’s funny. A combination of this and negative polarization is leading to the United States being two nations, one Red, one Blue and when we get around to attempting to elect the next president, the system simply won’t be prepared for the passions it will stir up.
  7. A potentially historic miscalculation on the part of Republicans
    It’s possible that, much like European powers in the lead up to WW1, when the time comes and Republicans have a choice between peacefully transitioning us into autocracy or fucking with us all so we want to take up arms, they will choose the latter not because they have to, but because they want to. It’s possible that by the 2024 — 2025 period, Republicans will see a civil war as their only choice to consolidate power, even if it’s clear that they could get everything they ever wanted within the system they so obviously loath.

And, honestly, the only thing standing in the way of an autocrat becoming president in 2025 and seizing “total control” pretty quick is any potential cleaving between MAGA and the Republican Party that takes place between now and then.

Given what I’m seeing right now, it definitely doesn’t seem as though that’s going to be a problem. At this point, it seems as though Republicans will first win power in Congress in 2022, then win the presidency (one way or anther) in 2024 and that will be that.

The autocracy we feared during the Trump Era will come, just four years later than we all expected. But…

There’s a real chance that our transition from liberal democracy to autocracy won’t be as smooth as I think — there could be a civil war. One side — or the other — won’t accept the results of the election and the country will finally buckle. All the nightmare scenarios that I came up with in 2020-2021, will just happen in 2024-2025.

If what happened in 2020 is any indication, the first sign that we would have that something was amiss would be on the local level. Instead of people who simply do their job as Americans and do the rather perfunctory duty of certifying the win of A Democrat, this doesn’t happen. In crucial voting districts all across swing states, Bannon’s “spiritual shock troops” either refuse to certify the win of A Democrat, or they go so far as to YOLO things and switch the win to Trump.

As this happens, the tension in United States escalates day by day. The very rallying cry of MAGA in 2020 — “Stop The Steal” will be adopted by the center-Left when it becomes clear that the MAGA New Right is hell bent on brazenly stealing the 2024 election in broad daylight.

But remember, the center-Left has a very different personality than the MAGA New Right. The center-Left, for all it’s problems with “cancel culture” and being “woke” is still actually connected to reality. So, there would be a struggle between the natural inclination of centrist Liberals to let the “process work” and Leftists who would want to burn everything to the ground given how corrupted everything had become.

All of this turmoil on the local level would find elections in crucial states thrown into the political realm where MAGA state legislatures and Secretary’s of State would begin to actively ensure that A Democrat is prevented from winning. Every day between Election Day 2024 and Certification Day 2025 things would grow more and more unstable in the United States as it became clear that Bannon’s long-planned “administrative coup” was actually going to work.

There would be mass confusion. Lots of lawsuits

And, remember, if Trump is involved, as all of this is going on, he would do everything in his personal power to rile up both sides. If his ongoing, progressive cognitive decline has gotten bad enough, he might even go transactional.

It would be around this point that I could see Blue governors begin to make serious plans to leave the Union. A lot would depend on what California was willing to do. But it would definitely make sense that California would be the first state to call a Secessionist Convention in preparation of leaving the Union if the 2024 election is, in fact, stolen.

But by some point between Thanksgiving and Christmas, you could see some sort of summit of Blue Governors where they debate their plans to leave the Union if the very thing that the MAGA New Right wants — to turn the United States into an autocracy — actually happens.

And as we approached Certification Day in January 2025, the last step in the crisis would happen. If you thought Certification Day 2021 was bad, just wait until Republicans are actively going over and above what they did then when it rolls around in 2025. So, the system will have been corrupted at both the local and state level. And then if that doesn’t work, Republicans will again try to throw the election into the House and Senate to buy time, if nothing else.

So, let me be clear — anyone who thinks we’re going to have some sort of MAGA New Right revolution a la The Turner Diaries — is a fool. Any Second American Civil War we have is probably going to be started by Blue States leaving the Union out of disgust that the fix is in.

Therefore, by the time Certification Day 2025 rolls around, it could very well be a foregone conclusion that we’re going to have a pretty organized civil war. Republicans have no shame and don’t apparently care about the consequences of their actions, so, lulz, we could find ourselves in the absolute worst of worlds because not only are states actively thinking about leaving the Union around this time, but the whole process of figuring out who is POTUS will be languishing in Congress. Republicans, because they are politically blood thirsty and will cheat, will win the power struggle, but there’s a chance states will begin leaving the Union.

It won’t be deranged, individual MAGA New Right blowing stuff up in some sort of rearguard action. It’s going to be a Blue Nation verses a Red Nation. A lot of the same things that happened in the First American Civil War will happen in the second. The U.S. Military will implode as people from Blue States leave it to establish a new Blue State military.

But one thing we have to expect in late 2024 to early 2025 is a mass migration of people across the country as people no longer feel safe living in an area of the country that doesn’t fit their politics. It could be rather frightening.

If it were, God forbid, to happen, I would guess that a Second American Civil War will begin between Certification Day 2025 and Inauguration Day 2025. In other words, as Trump is being sworn in, mass chaos will have erupted across the United States.

Once the hollowed out American military turns it attention to the Blue rebellion at the behest of Trump, it won’t be too long before WMD are sized and used by both sides. Not only would America bomb itself into oblivion with its eyes wide open, but it will be done in the context of WW3 definitely breaking out across the globe because the US will be too busy imploding to ensure the continuation of the post WW2 global order.

How’s that for a New World Order.

Macro trends are not on America’s side. As I keep saying, 2024 is going to be it. It’s the year when either the United States turns into a Russian-style “managed democracy” or there’s a civil war. Now, this isn’t going to be a complete list of the 50 states, but I am going to highlight some of the states that may be more problematic should a Second American Civil War erupt.

Oregon
The state is really two states and, as such, is probably going to be a major flashpoint in any Second Civil War. What’s likely to happen is Portland will buck any attempt at a putsch on the part of bonkers Right wing nutjobs in the rest of the state and, as such, either there’s a really blood struggle in the state or there are a massive amount of political refugees from the Portland area as the rest of the state sides with MAGA.

Virginia
Again, this is really two states. There’s the NOVA-Richmond-Hampton Roads urban corridor and everything else. It’s very easy to imagine a situation — especially with Virginia’s historic ties to the first Civil War — where the state implodes as we grow closer and closer to a Second Civil War. Too many good old boys in the rural areas of Virginia might get wrapped up in the “Lost Cause” mythos and decide to seize places like Danville (the last capitol of the Confederacy) or Richmond (another Confederate capitol.) If nothing else, simply because of the larger population of the “Blue” parts of the state, there will be significant violence and political refugees as the Blues consolidate power.

Michigan
I don’t know as much about this state, but it definitely seems as though once the pre-war process of coups and political consolation begins that there will be at least a coup attempt on the part of the Far Right. Again, don’t underestimate how once you actually start murdering people that the dynamics of things change significantly. It’s very possible that there would be a coup in the state, it would fail, and there would be significant political violence as the state’s Blue population fought back and put the state firmly on the Blue side.

New York
Yet again, we have a situation where once politics fails us that the otherwise banal regional differences in a state tears it apart. New York City is far more progressive than the rest of New York State and, depending on how things work out, it’s possible that New York City could become a revolutionary hotbed to the point that is tears itself away from the rest of the state and proclaims itself a Free City. This almost happen during the first Civil War. If nothing else, there will be a serious jiggling of the relationship between NYC and the rest of the state to the point where it aligns itself in any Second Civil War with New Jersey and Connecticut in a way that update New York does not. Or, again, there could be significant political consolidation as Blues from all over the northeast flee to New York and the MAGA-friendly natives of the state flee elsewhere.

Maine
I really don’t know that much about this state other than a vague belief that the northern part of the state is far different than the southern part. It’s very easy to imagine significant consolation in the state one way or another as people flee to it as the rest of the country buckles. The state is big — if sparsely populated — and it’s strategic location near the Canadian border might be enough for it to be the home to large refugee camps.

Texas
Texas would be in an odd situation as the country fell into civil war because its long-term political trend is shifting Blue, but it’s part of the South and a lot of people consider themselves Southern and MAGA. So either it simply buckles into its own intra-civil war or the MAGA cocksucker fucktards push out all the Blues who flee to Blue States nearby. The end result would be a lot of pissed off former Texans who would be of great benefit to the Blue cause.

California
In a sense, the whole fate of the United States rests on what California does. If it simply bolts from the Union, then that significantly hobbles the Blue cause on the ground. California sitting on its hands and become its own nation in the event of a Second Civil War makes it far more likely that either Red states win or there is some sort of half-ass balkanization of the United States. But if California stays and fights, then they could provide not only the necessary economy and population for a Blue state victory — after many, many dead — but also something of a vision for what America would look like after we’re finished bombing ourselves into oblivion.

The Deep South
It’s very easy to imagine at the onset of a Second American Civil War most of the old Confederacy on a political level getting extremely excited and having a massive amount of momentum to either leave the Union outright or support the Republican controlled Congress’ attempt to brazenly steal the election. Then reality would sink in — all of the Southern states have significant African American populations and once politics is no longer a viable method of solving problems then the far more brutal dynamics of realpolitik would kick in. I just can’t imagine millions of African Americans lulzing a return to the Confederacy, no matter how badly the white political establishment of those states may want it. So, even though the South has a lot of people and a big economy, it would be, on a regional basis, too busy fighting a race war to really help the Red cause all that much. If things really grew as radical as I fear they will — probably because WMD are stolen and cities start to get vaporized — it’s the Deep South where you’re most likely to see some WW2 level atrocities as radicalized whites begin to murder blacks en mass.

As for the rest of the states, their ability to pick one side or the other is probably far easier and their biggest problem would be dealing with political refugees.

Or, put another way, we’re fucked. We’re totally, completely fucked one way or another. Either we turn into an autocracy or Red and Blue begin to murder each other in cold political blood. The usual outcome of all this bullshit that we have come to expect — simply muddling along until we come to some solution one way or another — is not longer a valid option.

The Future Is Wetware


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Before I begin, let’s mull something Trump said once. As I remember it, Trump rambled something about how “the Deep State” could “read our minds” via our microwaves or some shit. Is it possible it wasn’t what we thought — his addled brain coming up with bullshit — but something he actually knew about once he became president?

I doubt it, but it makes you think.

I mean, here I am thinking Big Tech can read my mind — just imagine what the NSA or MI6 can do. And it starts to get a little spooky when you think how much of our lives are rigged up to the Internet. The first thing we may have to worry about when the Singularity turns hard isn’t the Terminator, but our fucking government controlling us to an unprecedented level.

Anyway, back to the issue at hand: the future is wetware.

What I mean by this is, if you assume that the technology to read our minds already exists, what if you took it to the next level and figured out a way to use our own wetware as our next Internet. Using a device found in Arthur C. Clarke’s 3001: Final Odyssey, you could totally re-imagine human interaction with the digital realm.

You could send “m-mail” from mind to mind. Watch video in your mind’s eye. Listen to music in your mind. In fact, I would go so far as to suggest that it might even be possible to use your own mind’s processing power to help things along. That may be pushing it, but it seems something to think about.

The point of all of this is — why the fuck are we talking about Clubhouse — which is nothing more than a re-imagined rural partyline –instead of jawdropping changes in the human experience like the Internet became over about 20 years.

What is wrong with us? Where are our Snowdens of yesterday?

Anyway, seems like about $1 trillion is being left on the table because of the shortsightedness of the nerds of Silicon Valley.

Tik-Tok’s ‘Soft Singularity’


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Something’s up. I don’t know what it is, but Tik-Tok (and possibly the Chinese government) is up to something. When you start to seriously consider that Tik-Tok (and as such the Chinese government) can read your mind via your cellphone, you got a problem.

Now, the experiment I suggested people do with Tik-Tok apparently doesn’t work — someone I know via Twitter handed their phone to their boyfriend and what I thought would happen, didn’t happen.

So, this makes one wonder how it is that the “spooky” shit that Tik-Tok is up to can possibly happen.

If you want to imagine still that Tik-Tok is reading our minds, one possibility that they have their digital telepathy somehow “imprint” with your specific mind after a certain point so my experiment doesn’t work. They know your specific brain signals well enough that simply having someone else use the phone doesn’t right away change what you’re pushed.

Now, let me be clear — the only reason why I even propose this bonkers conspiracy is the repeated times that Tik-Tok (and to be fair, other Big Tech companies) have pushed me content (read: ads) that seems to brazenly reference my internal monologue. Tik-Tok is just the absolute brazen at it. When it starts to push videos that reference the abstract of “women who looks like the woman that is often in my mind” then, well, something fucked up is going on.

But I’m prepared to admit defeat. I just don’t have any New York Times-level evidence to support my claim. This is a very rarely viewed Website, so it’s not like anyone cares what I think.

ECREE & ‘Digital Telepathy’


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

So, how could we possibly prove that our phones are, in some way, reading our minds. I think the first step would be to get someone at, say, Wired, to do some basic scientific method stuff with their phone.

They get someone else to use Tik-Tok for a few minutes (or whatever) then see if the they begin to get pushed content that is different from what was otherwise pushed to the phone.

If you could prove that the only variable was the mind of the person using the phone, then, well, you got a story.

But I have a feeling even that wouldn’t be enough. We’d have to have some sort of insider expose it all — with proof. Then, maybe, what I think is pretty obvious — that Big Tech is hiding their ability to read or minds — would come to the public’s attention.

It wouldn’t be THAT big a deal, but for the national security part of it all. If the Chinese government is rummaging through the minds of America’s youth via their phones, it would make sense that the US GOVERNMENT one day (especially under an autocratic regime) might use Big Tech’s ability to read our minds as a gateway to pretty much total control over the populace.

Yet, I know this sounds very bonkers. And I’m probably wrong. And yet…

Think Big: Silicon Valley & The Soft Singularity of ‘Digital Telepathy’


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

A long time ago, when dinosaurs still walked the earth, I was in college and obsessed with this thing called the Internet. This was before the World Wide Web. This was back when having an email address was, in itself, something of a future shock.

Flash forward to the present day and, meh, we’ve been in a technological holding pattern for about a decade now. Sure, a lot of apps have been designed, but the basic thing that powers it all hasn’t changed in over a decade: the smartphone.

Now, here’s where things get tricky.

I think Big Tech has figured out a way to read our minds. And, what’s more, they’re getting kind of brazen about it because, I mean, who’s going to believe that our phones are reading our minds? And, let me be clear, I absolutely hate conspiracy theories. I think they’re the last refuge of the intellectually dishonest. So, I’m very reluctant to think what I’m saying I think: that Big Tech can read or minds and they’re using that ability on the DL to sell us ads.

And, really, this would not be that big a deal real terms — at least not now — but for one thing: Tik-Tok. It’s at least possible that the Chinese government, through Tik-Tok is rummaging around in the minds of American’s youth via Tik-Tok. I say this because of all the services I suspect can read our minds, Tik-Tok is the absolute most brazen.

They really push it. I think about something once without telling anyone else and lo and behold, I get a pushed a video or ad about that subject the next time I log on to the service. This is not to say there aren’t plenty of other ways they’re figuring me out. They’re probably listening to me via my phone. They’re probably monitoring every way I use my phone and using algorithms to figure me out. I get all that. THAT makes sense.

It’s when I get pushed something on Tik-Tok that seems to not only reference something from within my internal monologue, but takes it to the next level of referencing, say, the appetence of a lost love that is floating around in my mind all the time. How does an algorithm figure THAT out?

And, if you want to got that route, if “algorithms” have gotten that advanced, then that, in itself, is a serious issue. That’s not an algorithm, that’s AI and that needs to be discussed and, if necessary, regulated.

Or, put another way, I’m beginning to think we’ve already reached a “Soft Singularity.” A combination of oligarchy, greed and fear of the public’s reaction is causing Big Tech to keep this fact away from the average person. But it seems that if they keep fucking leaning into their ability to Black Mirror shit that there will, at some point, come a moment of reckoning.

But I’m a nobody. No one listens to me.

My Convoluted Approach To Developing A Novel



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’ve been working on a novel — in one form or another — seriously for about three years now. And things have finally come to a head. It’s put up or shut up time. But here’s my method of development that I’ve finally settled upon. It’s a three layered approach.

Outline
With this, the highest level, I move scenes around all the time. Like — All. The. Time. I have all these rules of thumb that I demand I follow for strictly arbitrary reasons. But I still do it. And, honestly, no one would notice but me since I’m completely consumed by developing and writing this novel.

Scene Summary
This is where I lay the groundwork for actually writing the scene. I try to be as detailed as possible so my character do what I demand of them when I need them to do something. This really helps me get things going. The only problem is, of course, that sometimes I get to this point and I realize the scene is boring, or makes no sense or there’s no there there. Then I throw everything in the air and try again. This is a real sticking point for the last year or so.

The Scene
This is when I sit down and actually write the scene. I’m usually a bit tipsy when I write scenes — or drunk. I like to keep things loose. I’ve written tens of thousands of words that end up in the junk file for no other reason than, well, it just doesn’t work on a macro level.

It’s the dynamic between these three levels that has caused me to spin my wheels for years now. But I’ve decided to kind of force the issue. I’m going to write this goddamn fucking first draft one way or another NOW.