Month: March 2018

Tipping Point: Dark Forces Are Aligning Against Trump & Using Stormy Daniels

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I am just the right age to remember what was going on 20 years ago with then President Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky. There came a point, a tipping point, when the scandal took on a life of its own and it just blew up far faster than anyone could have possibly have imagined.

I feel as though we’re lurching towards a similar tipping point with Donald Trump and Stormy Daniels. I say this only because this scandal isn’t going away, at least for the time being. I think some of it is how simple this scandal is, how traditional it is — it’s a presidential sex scandal.

As such, the mouth breathers out there who don’t care or understand TrumpRussia, are able to wrap their dumb minds around it in a way they can’t with the rest of the dumpster fire that is the Trump Administration. Something feels different about the Stormy Daniels mess. It seems as though dark forces have aligned to bring down the Trump Administration in a way none of us could have possibly expected.

That’s thing thing about what happened to Bill Clinton. The whole thing really was a witch hunt because a small group of people had a personal hatred of him. Linda Tripp, the Goldberg family and Matt Drudge used Monica Lewinsky to put Bill Clinton in a logic trap, one that nearly cost him his presidency. I’m suggesting that it’s possible, not probably, that a similar situation is afoot. It’s possible that some very powerful people have finally grown fed up with Trump and they believe they’ve figured out how to get rid of him: a traditional sex scandal.

But I have no inside information, it’s just a hunch. So only time will tell. I will suggest, however, that if you combine Stormy Daniels with Bob Mueller’s TrumpRussia investigation the Trump Administration is facing an existential threat in a way none of us could have expected.

Only time will tell, I guess.

‘Trumplandia’ — #Lyrics To A Fast Pop-Rap Anti-Trump Protest Song

I may have used this as a song title before, but I have come up with a new way of using it, so there you go. This would be a really fast song like “We Didn’t Start The Fire” and “It’s The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine.) That’s the vision, at least.

Trumplandia
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

it started with Russian bots
telling us what to do
playing with our heads late at night
giving us a fright
then the comedy letter ended Hillary’s gaul
she had to take the fall, take the fall

before you know it
we wake up and it’s Trumplandia
Trump is in control
the chaos rolls in like the tide
and people are eating Tidepods for a like
so much has happened where to begin, to begin, to begin

don’t mess with the Mooch
he’ll just screw the pooch
people at the airport in support
of immigrants
Trump passes tax cuts in order to loot
the treasury
dear me, dear me, dear me

we wake up and it’s Trumplandia
we wake up and it’s Trumplandia
we wake up and it’s Trumplandia

we’re all in Trumplandia now
when will it end? when will it end?
will Stormy Daniels bring us respite
from the hell that lasts all day and all night

[bridge]
just hope it’s over soon
hope it ends with Trump behind bars
or at least a zoo
what can you do, what can you do

each day brings with it a new scandal I’m afraid
people tell me to shut up and just get laid
we’ll they can suck it as far as I care
this fight ain’t over, don’t you fear

we wake up and it’s Trumplandia
we wake up and it’s Trumplandia
we wake up and it’s Trumplandia

‘Eyeache’ — Lyrics To A R&B Love Ballad

I can’t sleep — it’s too early to go to sleep anyway — so I’m relaxing by writing song lyrics to songs that will never, ever be performed. I just liked telling stories in verse, so you get this. This would be a dark, funky R&B song in my imagination.

Eachache
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

you catch my eye every time we meet
I think of the ways I’d please you
given half a chance
but you just smile and walk away from me
leaving to my cross thoughts
of how everything is for not

your beauty makes my eyes ache, eyes ache
you break my heart
you break my heart
leaving me with eye ache, eye ache

my eyeache is real
wish you would give me the thrill
of allowing me to give you a twirl
but there’s little for me to say
maybe, baby, you’ll come my way

we should live a little I believe
let me have you believe
that things will get better with you in my arms
leave all those troubles behind

your beauty makes my eyes ache, eyes ache
you break my heart
you break my heart
leaving me with eye ache, eye ache

[bridge]
you’re just my type
one to give me delight
wish you would listen real close
let me hold you tight

but now it’s never going to happen
you’re leaving town for good
taking your man with you
at least, that’s what’s understood

your beauty makes my eyes ache, eyes ache
you break my heart
you break my heart
leaving me with eye ache, eye ache

V-Log: Will The Stormy Daniels’ Storm Bring Down Trump? #Resist

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I am just right age to remember how 20 years ago conservatives told me with full-throated vigor how “character counts.” Now, of course, they’re oddly silent on this whole matter. I just don’t get it. I really don’t. The hypocrisy on the Right on this matter is pretty epic.

The Final Days? More #MAGA, Stormy Daniels & The #DPRK

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I don’t know. I just don’t know. I want to say we’re in the Final Days of the Trump Administration, but, alas, I fear that simply is not the case. I fear we’re going to have to suffer for a lot longer than any of us ever imagined. But the below video is interesting.

It Might Be Stormy Daniels, Not #TrumpRussia, That Brings Trump Down

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

The only reason why I think it may be the growing Stormy Daniels scandal, not TrumpRussa that finally break the back of our American Caligula’s administration is sex is significantly more easy to explain to the mouth breathers who support Trump than the TrumpRussia imbroglio.

Sex is universal and easy to understand.

Now, the typical Trump supporter simply bobs and weaves when it comes to Stormy Daniels and says the whole thing was consensual and I should just shut up and enjoy the humming economy. But it’s proven that Trump violated campaign finance law, then we enter a pretty crucial point in time. The entire Trump long-con will be laid bare and the whole thing could come crashing down — or Trump supporters won’t care and we’ll have an extended Constitutional crisis on our hands.

If we finally reach the point where the president can break laws with impunity simply because the nation finally lacks the political willpower to do anything about it, then America as we know it is over. We will finally have become a fascist state.

I wish there was some easy answer to it all, but there isn’t. Trump has paved the way for us as a nation to finally shrug at proven law breaking. As such, it’s possible that if Trump is proven to have broken campaign finance law and nothing happens, well, that’s all she wrote. Trump will feel emboldened to do whatever he wants to.

Trump Would Be An Idiot To Meet Kim Jung Un In Asia

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I’m willing to give Trump measured praise for managing to get Kim Jung Un to meet him, but I feel the whole thing could blow up in Trump’s face pretty quickly. By agreeing to meet Kim somewhere presumably on the Korean peninsula Trump is giving Kim exactly what he wants: respect on the global stage

Add to this the likelihood that Trump is completely clueless about the unintended consequences of his actions, and you the setup to a bad international relations joke. I have said many times before that during my in Korea, I noticed that problems were solved in one of two ways: either something really strange happens or there’s a fistfight.

Anyway, I still believe this isn’t over yet. I still predict it’s possible that a war would start between the US and the DPRK sometime in August. But we’ll see, I guess.

Of Stormy Daniels, Donald Trump & Bill Clinton

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

So, I’m old enough to remember how apoplectic the Right got about Bill Clinton’s bimbo eruptions. And so here we are 20 years later with a new sex scandal and we’re hearing not a peep from them. It would be funny if it wasn’t so tragic.

It’s really, really tragic.

But we’ll see. We’ll see if anything comes of it. It will be interesting to see if anything comes of all of this. It probably won’t. It probably will all be just another scandal that Trump manages to avoid any serious problems with.

‘No Sign O The Times’ — #Lyrics To Funk Anti-Trump Protest Song

This is just me screwing around. I’m trying to write a homage to Prince’s Sign O The Times that talks about how Trump not signing his hush agreement with with Stormy Daniels is pretty typical of this era we now live in. Let me stress, I have no beats and I’m just screwing around.

No Sign O The Times
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

in this crazy era of ours what can I say
our leaders demand hush agreements of lovers
so they can be president
then they….don’t sign
if that’s not a sign of the times
I don’t know what is
if you get what I mean
if you get what I mean
if you get what I mean

it’s no sign o the times
I’m afraid
people want all the power
but none of the responsibility
they think they can get away with it all
and we’ll ignore it
as long as we’re entertained

it’s no sign o the times
it’s no sign o the times
it’s no sign o the times

[bridge]
but we can only hope
that the people are no dopes
that they won’t be rubes
that they can see the truth

it’s no sign o the times
it’s no sign o the times
it’s no sign o the times

‘Take The Money, Stormy’ — #Lyrics To A R&B Anti-Trump Protest Song

This is not meant to be a parody song, but I could see how one might think it is. The issue is, I just don’t have beats, so I have to listen to existing songs to get some beat structure. But this song would be a R&B song about how Trump got Stormy Daniels to sign a hush money agreement.

Take The Money, Stormy
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

last night I read the polls
it seems as though things are very close
we’ve had our good times and our bad
sent you pictures I shouldn’t have
now it’s time for our love to end
so all I can say for the sake of the nation is

take the money, Stormy
it’s for the best
take the money Stormy
I can ask no less

I’m not a perfect man I know
you remind me of Ivanka as I’ve said
but she’s my daughter so she I can not bed
you’re as beautiful as they come
yet things have come to an end for us
my desire to make myself president
only makes Melania hiss

take the money, Stormy
it’s for the best
take the money Stormy
I can ask no less

[bridge]
your touch was lovely
made me feel so big and so strong
it’s obvious though
we can no longer get along

when this is all over
maybe we can talk
but it’s time for this to be over
election is almost hear
and I can’t roll over and let you talk
to the fake news press

take the money, Stormy
take the money, Stormy
take the money, Stormy