This is meant to tell the theoretical story of Donald J. Trump and his communicates director, Hope Hicks. I have my suspicions that they’re, um…doing it and because it’s a really screwed up situation it seems like great fodder for a power ballad that, say, Bernie Taupin might write.
The Talented Ms. Hicks
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform
she directs communication late at night
telling her man he has the world
in his very, very, very large hands
what Melania doesn’t know what hurt her
Donald is of the flesh and weak for
the talented Ms. Hicks
the talented Ms. Hicks
the talented Ms. Hicks
the talented Ms. Hicks
brings with her vitality
she’s perfect as can be
makes the darkness flee
even at night she shines bright like the moon
her touch is ever so smooth
what’s a man to do
Donald doesn’t care what the press will think
he’s above the law
at least he thinks
he’ll pardon himself if need be to be with her
what happens in the Lincoln bedroom or
the Oval shouldn’t matter to anyone
when you have the nuclear codes
the talented Ms. Hicks licks her lips
moves her hips just a little bit for kicks
she has Donald wrapped around her thumb
who knows what fate will bring with it
in the end it will just be she and The Donald
