Tag: Alexa Chung

Ok, Tik-Tok, I Get It, You’re Still Reading My Mind (Or Something): Alexa Chung Edition



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Now, let me begin by saying because of a very strange set of circumstances a few years ago it’s at least possible that an FBI agent in Washington D.C. monitors this blog to see if I mention fashion It Girl Alexa Chung. This stems from a dumb misunderstanding.

Anyway, let me be clear: the conditions that caused me to briefly have a celebrity crush on Alexa Chung are now long gone. I still have an obsessive personality, but now I’m obsessed with the novel I’m working on.

The reason why I say all of this is today I was minding my own business, using Tik-Tok when I was served a video that was all these photos of Alexa Chung. I have long worried that maybe Tik-Tok is, I dunno, reading my mind, and the fact that I have not in any way do anything anywhere to indicate to Tik-Tok that I would be interested in Alexa Chung for any reason is very odd. I also got served Mighty Boosh videos today, as well, which is equally odd.

Now, I am well aware that extraordinary claims require extraordinary proof and so given how bonkers the idea that Tik-Tok is, in any way, reading my mind is, I’m leery of giving the idea too much credence. And, yet, I’m stumped how Tik-Tok’s “algorithms” could narrow down my personal interest in both Alexa Chung and the Mighty Boosh if I’ve done absolutely nothing of late online that would give them reason to believe that.

But I guess somehow they figured it out without reading my mind. But I am left with a lingering unease. Tik-Tok knows way too much about me and it’s a mystery how it happened.

PS: Dear FBI Agent — leave me alone!

Oh Lort, Is Phoebe Waller-Bridge A Babe


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Let’s talk about the curious case of Phoebe Waller-Bridge. Relative to Hollywood metrics of beauty, she’s something of a square peg in a round hole. But relative to, like, normal people, she’s a smoking hot babe. In my mind, at least, she’s a smoking hot babe. She has a certain élan to her that isn’t easily pinned down.

Babe.

Ms. Waller-Bridge is so unique, out there and creative that she always keeps you guessing. And what could be more sexy than that? She’s so interesting just by being herself that audiences can really relate to her in a way they can’t with some more established stars.

She probably has a great Hollywood career ahead of her. I could see her being a stable of romcoms for years to come. Though, I also think she would play a great Dr. Susan Calvin from the I, Robot short stories. But I think that says more about my eagerness for one of those short stories to be turned into a movie than anything else.

One thing I find interesting is how she seems to be glowing up right now while another one of my celebrity crushes, Alexa Chung, seems a bit long in tooth. Not to say Ms. Chung isn’t still gorgeous, but the difference in mentality between Ms. Waller-Bridge and Ms. Chung is striking. Ms. Waller-Bridge seems to be getting younger while Ms. Chung is definitely looking a very attractive 35-ish.

Still a classic babe.

Anyway. I have to think of something to make myself feel better than now that fucking Trump has been acquitted by the Senate. I will say, in passing, that one of my novel’s female characters is inspired by Ms. Waller-Bridge. But the connection is extremely tenuis beyond what’s going on in my head when I write the character.

The Struggle Is Real: Developing My Novel’s Female Romantic Lead #AmWriting



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m using Alexa Chung’s appearance, public persona (and style) as something of a cheatsheet for my novel’s female romantic lead. In fact, whenever I can’t think of an aspect of the character off the top of my head, I pull up Wikipedia or YouTube and see what Alexa Chung does.

It really helps to have a public figure to inspire you when it comes to such an important character. The character, though, isn’t NOT “based” on her, so much as it is simply influenced and inspired by her. The character is an amalgam of several women I’m fond of, including Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Jennifer Lawrence, Liz Plank, Erin Ryan, Jodi Kantor and the odd woman I’ve dated here and there.

I finally understand what an author means when they say one of their characters is “an amalgam.” I really need to do a formal personality profile of several characters, but I find actually writing the character out in the copy is more in line with my personal needs as a writer.

I will note, however, that my general fondness for developing female characters is making me self-conscious about not having enough MALE characters. But I think I’ve fixed that. I’m going to have to break the rule about only six POV characters to do it, but lulz.

Idle Mulling of Phoebe Waller-Bridge & The Female Romantic Lead of The #Novel I’m Developing #AmWriting



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I really hate it when people like me talk about who they imagine would play this or that character in their “WIP.” Ugh. It’s just so preening and cloy and fucking annoying.

Pretty much what I imagine my novel’s female romantic lead looking like.

And, yet, here I am, doing that thing I, myself, hate when other people do it.

My only excuse is I’m a drinking and writing and absolutely no one reads this blog (in real terms) so, lulz. The only reason why I keep coming back to this notion that Phoebe Waller-Bridge would be great to play the female romantic lead of this novel is who the character is inspired by — Alexa Chung.

Ms. Waller-Bridge’s phenotype would be perfect to make my vision for the character a reality. She’s also British, which is something I imagine for the character to be. Or, put another way, she’s got a British accent, even if the exact nature of that Commonwealth accent is never fully explained (or at least understood) by everyone else in the novel. In all honesty, the character isn’t even really inspired that much on Alexa Chung as she is by a South African woman I dated briefly in Seoul who had some very endearing verbal ticks. And, yet, the more serious I become with this novel, the less, in real terms, I care about even worrying about Hollywood or any type of adaptation. The point is write the best damn novel (one story, two novels) I can and worry about everything else later.

It’s just so unlikely that I will ever actually sell this novel, all of that seems not only a lot of useless preening, but also a waste of time. But, like I said, I see this blog as more me talking to myself than anything else.

So, lulz.

A Quirk About The Nature of The Female Romantic Lead of The Novel I’m Developing



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I have a lingering celebrity crush on Alexa Chung, so I’ve constructed the female romantic lead of the novel I’m developing who is something of a homage to her. But there’s a problem.

My female romantic lead has an Asian name, but doesn’t LOOK all that Asian, just like Alexa Chung. So, I could see hilarity ensuing as casting directors struggle to find someone who can “pass” for white but is actually Asian. Or, they could cast someone like Jennifer Lawrence or Phoebe Waller-Bridge who would fit the novel’s description of the character, but not be Asian.

It was just my imagination….

At this point, I have to note that the idea that I even sell this novel to a publisher is rather fantastical, so I’m doing little more than mentally masturbating to even broach these things. But I have to psyche myself up to finish the marathon of developing and writing a novel somehow, so this is one of the ways I do it.

Me talking about if Jennifer Lawrence or Phoebe Waller-Bridge was going to play the female romantic lead of a movie adaptation of the novel I’m working on right now is like wondering if I could score a supermodel after having won the lottery.

Anyway, it’s this type of quirk that makes the whole only-a-certain-type-of-person-can-play-a-role seem a bit ludicrous, even though it is, at least in my eyes, totally legitimate.

I am growing closer to getting back to actually writing on this novel, which is pretty cool. But I still have a huge amount of work to do.

Development Struggles With My Novel’s Female Romantic Lead



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I started off wanting my novel’s female romantic lead to be someone like Alexa Chung. Then she gradually evolve into someone more like Jodi Kantor. Now, she seems more inspired by Crooked Media’s Erin Ryan.

The reasons for this are simple. Chung is too much of a celebrity to write easily and, besides, what would she do? It’s difficult to stand around being gorgeous and witty in a novel. Her character needs to be active in the story. Meanwhile, while the actual human being Jodi Kantor probably has a lot of character, my writing isn’t good enough to portray the type of person she is (very smart and intense) without her character overshadowing the hero. So, now, I find myself thinking about using Erin Ryan as inspiration.

Ryan is very smart and has a lot of spunk. She’s also a bit younger than the other two women, so that affords a different dynamic than might otherwise exist. The dynamic between men, women and age is something you really have to think about seriously if you’re trying to write a novel that’s believable.

None of the women I mentioned would sit next to me in a restaurant. I can’t help how old I am or what I look like. I am who I am. I mean well and can tell a good story. It’s their loss if they think I’m just middle-aged creepy weirdo.

Anyway, my novel’s female romantic lead is now a combination of Alexa Chung, Jodi Kantor AND Erin Ryan. But, remember, while I can articulate a vision pretty well, my writing simply isn’t what it could be. So, there’s every reason to believe that while I can explain to you my vision for the character, should you actual read the character in the novel, you won’t be able to see the connection as clearly as I’ve stated here.

Who knows.

Idle, Incoherent Rambling About Novel Character Inspirations & The Rise Of The American Fourth Reich

Shelton Bumgarner

Some thoughts.

The Struggle Is Real: Constructing A Complex, Believable Female Romantic Lead For My Novel

Shelton Bumgarner

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

With the complaints of outspoken Hollywood feminists like Olivia Wilde and Jessica Chastain ringing in my mind, I find myself trying to construct a romantic partner for my Hero who is strong enough and complex enough that I feel she will be noticed by women who may read the novel.

I’m getting kind of desperate. I know what her name is and what she looks like. But figuring out her personality is proving to be really, really tough. In my desperation, I am turning to someone who has enough of a public footprint that I can use her as inspiration. (Who? Not tellin.) I only do this because, what else am I going to do? I know the woman’s musical tastes and her age, so that goes a long ways towards using her as the foundation of the character, at least in that side of her life.

One element of the character — her professionalism and career drive — is proving to be the hardest to construct because I would need to hang out with the woman who is inspiring that side of her and, well, I’m just a middle-aged loser in a fly over state. So, I’m going to have to some reverse engineering. For this side of her life, I’m really studying Jodi Kantor. She’s a little older than I need the character to be, however, so it’s not an exact fit. But I think if I look at the social media footprint of women like her on Twitter, then that will help a lot.

One thing that’s proving to be a real pain to figure out is, of all things, how my two romantic leads deal with Thanksgiving. Ugh. So difficult. But every problem is an opportunity in disguise.

V-Log: The State Of My #Novel I’m #Writing The Morning Of August 19th, 20018

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Where things stand as of right now.