I Believe The Zendaya – Tom Holland Relationship Is A Lie

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I have no inside information, but the so-called “relationship” between Zendaya and Tom Holland seems like a bullshit PR stunt. I’m sure they like each other as friends and co-starts, but I just don’t see Zendaya dating someone like Holland. It doesn’t fit her vibe.

He’s just too nice.

Seems like Zendaya would want an older bad boy with a little bit more edge. And, as I understand it all the Spidermen in the franchise have “dated” their co-stars, so, lulz.

But I could be wrong. I usually am. It just seems like this relationship is a little too pat and convenient for everyone involved.

The 2024 Election Is Going To Be A Massive Clusterfuck


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I don’t think people are giving enough thought to how the United States is now an anocracy — between democracy and autocracy. Starting in 2023, when Republicans control Congress again, things are going to grow lit very quickly. Huge swaths of the government are going to be doing one thing and one thing only — being at some point in the process of impeaching both Biden and Harris.

There could even be multiple impeachments as Republicans try to make being impeached both a huge deal (for Biden and Harris) and no big deal (for Trump.) Republicans have no shame and wallow in hypocrisy at every turn, so the whole thing is going to be dangerous and idiotic at the same time.

But it’s the 2024 election that we really have to worry about. In all honesty, it doesn’t matter who the Republican nominee is. The entire edifice of the Republican Party is now bought in to the benefits of autocracy, of establishing a white Christian ethno state in the United States.

Now, given how fucked up everything is, Trump — or whomever — could very well win the 2024 election outright without any cheating. But it’s their nature to cheat, so they will, get caught and then nothing will happen since Republicans are above the law.

Steve K. Bannon

But the entire administration of the 2024 election from the local, to state to Federal level will be criminally corrupt. It could be that 2020 is looked backed upon as the last free and fair election in American history. We will know we’re in trouble the moment local election boards begin to certify their votes and all hell breaks loose. If that doesn’t work, then Republican controlled state legislatures will fuck around with things to make sure the Republican wins.

And if THAT doesn’t work they will figure out some way to throw the election into the House and Senate. The whole thing will be a catastrophe and a clusterfuck of historic proportions.

The only issue is if we slip peacefully into autocracy or if the whole thing collapses and we have a civil war. Even if somehow we somehow manage to avoid autocracy or civil war in 2024, we’ll just punt the existential problems we have down the road four more years and it’ll be 2028 when we have our existential choice.

The point is –we’re fucking doomed. This is it, the end. Call it the Great Reset or the Fourth Turning, it’s going to happen sooner rather than later. America is way too unstable at the moment for us to simply continue to drift through history like we have over the last few generations.

Everything Is So Dumb


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

While I know I’m being extremely paranoid to think fat fuck Mike Pompeo cares what I say about him on a very obscure blog, he IS very petty and autocratic so I would believe it if you said he did.

But, for the record any FBI agents looking this blog — I’m extremely harmless. It’s just whenever I think of America’s slip into autocracy, I think of smug fat fuck Mike Pompeo lurking in the wings to be Trump’s handpicked successor. I must note that it’s not like there’s anything particularly special about fat fuck Mike Pompeo — there are a dozen other people Trump could pick as his veep who would do exactly what Pompeo would do as POTUS.

The Man Who Would Be Autocrat

So, lulz.

But there are a few issues about Pompe that really fucking rub me the wrong way. They are issues that make me feel like getting drunk and ranting about how dangerous he is as possible autocrat.

One issue is what he did to the the State Department. Apparently, he was a horrific, corrupt Secretary of State who demeaned the the staff that he wasn’t able to drive out. Something about that really bothers me.

Another thing that bothers me is his hostile relationship to the Voice of America. All his dick moves towards reporters there is part of a broader effort on the part of the MAGA New Right to make the VOA official state media. They were working really hard to turn the VOA in a FOX News clone in the final days of the first Trump Administration.

Once Trump is POTUS again, they’re probably going to have at it again. They want the VOA to be the TASS of our coming Trumplandia autocracy. Something about that, too, really rubs me the wrong way. They’re just reporters trying to do their job, not need to make their lives and and careers pawns in the autocratic shenanigans of the MAGA New Right.

Anyway, remember, once the autocracy comes, things won’t change overnight. And, really, once Trump is president again, what will really be going on is we’re all going to be waiting to see when his veep becomes POTUS and, as such, becomes America’s Putin.

Ron DeSantis

Trump is so degranged that I find myself vacillating widely as to who he will pick to to be his veep. The logical choice is DeSantis. But Pompeo WAS really loyal to Trump in during the slow moving coup of late 2020, early 2021. But this is Trump we’re talking about, so it could be Gen. Mike Flynn that Trump picks.

Talk about a holy shit.

But one thing is for sure — 2023 – 2025 is going to be fucking lit. Chaos will reign. Impeachments will happen repeatedly. There may be a Certification Crisis. There may be a civil war. Who knows. All I do know is a lot of America’s macro problems are going to be worked out one way or another starting in January 2023.

Good luck.

Anocracy In America: The Inevitable Return Of Trumplandia


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

We’re kind of in a political lull at the moment. These are the last few days of democracy in America. Or, put another way, the United States is an anocracy now and it’s just a few more months before we lurch ever closer to being on the edge of autocracy.

Barring something I can’t predict, Trump is going to be the next president of the United States. A combination of voter suppression and outright, brazen cheating makes this an inevitability. And, honestly, Trump could win outright the way things are going.

When autocracy is very, very popular with about 45% of the electorate, your democracy is on its last legs. And that’s where America stands at the moment. But the key thing we all have to remember is it’s not Trump we have to worry about — it’s his Republican successor.

At the moment, at least, Trump is the Republican primary. Everything about Republican presidential politics revolves around Trump. What he is — or isn’t — going to do going forward. So, logically, what happens is Trump gets the nomination and whomever he names as his veep will ultimately be America’s Putin.

The guy — or woman — will become president after Trump and 20 years from now he or she will still be in office. There will be a Constitutional Convention. ICE will be weaponized and we’re going to wake up to an America that politically is identical to Putin’s Russia at the moment.

Fat fuck and would be autocrat Mike Pompeo.

Of course, there is the OTHER option, which is civil war. Currently, I think we’re going to just slip peacefully into autocracy for various reasons. The system is designed to accept whatever happens, even if it’s fraudulent. The American center-Left would have to show the type of guts that, to date, it has not shown for there to be any type of secession crisis in the 2024 – 2025 timeframe.

There probably will be a lot of talk about it, but, the end, Trump and his handpicked successor will shepard the United States into a full blown autocracy. That’s when people like me who are loudmouth cranks, who, to date, have had the luxury of living in a Western democracy will suddenly find themselves in hot water with the government.

But, much to the happiness of the MAGA New Right, we will no longer have to deal with the annoyance of the “Woke Agenda” and everyone who wants to can be as racist and misogynistic as they like.

So, this is it. The end of the American experiment. Good luck.

Officially Back Into The Second Act


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

While the actual text is garbage and there are too many scenes, I’ve “finished” the first act of a decent first draft of this novel. I think I’m going to have to admit to myself that this novel is probably not fit the “sweetspot” of between 80,000 and 120,000 words.

I have no idea why this is, but I’ve revised this thing many, many, many times and the first act always settles at about 50 scenes. If each scene is, on average, 1,000 words, well, lulz. The other acts aren’t as long, but, still, I’m pushing the length of a novel that I would be pitching as an unknown, untested author. I’m fully prepared to self-publish, but this is kind of my Hail Mary pass to get myself out of a rather fucking annoying situation.

I have a huge ego and believe that I’m interesting enough that one day soon I will be able to relive what I had in Seoul, only as a Blue Check liberal who bounces back and forth between NYC and LA.

I’m well aware that I’m being extremely delusional, but, lulz, I have to do something to keep going. Otherwise, I would just lie in bed and stare at the celling all day.

Now that I’m in the second act, I have to do a lot of reading. I’m now in the police procedural part of the novel. I know nothing about any of this, but I can read. And, if need be, I’ll get outside of my comfort zone and do even more research than I already plan to do. I’m even willing to pay someone with police experience to give me information as to how what I propose would actually play out.

I really believe in this project. And I have to keep reminding myself of the old adage about novels, that all novels are never finished, but abandoned. What this means is — you’re never going to “finish” your novel so it’s “perfect.” There comes a point when you just have to give up and produce something, anything that you can pitch to an agent.

Anyway. Wish me luck.

‘My Brother’s Keeper’ — #lyrics to a #pop #country song

My Brother’s Keeper
lyrics by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

his trucks get bigger and bigger
while my paycheck grows
ever smaller and smaller
he has the wife and the kids
while my life is on the skids
the family ties bind
but I feel myself torn

we’re all in this together
being our brother’s keeper
we’re all going to make it through
being our borther’s keeper
what am I to but
let my brother keep me

my family looks down on my lot
wondering if I ever had a shot
but they love me I know they do
doesn’t stop them throwing up their hands
what to do
what to do
what to do

we’re all in this together
being our brother’s keeper
we’re all going to make it through
being our brother’s keeper
what am I to but
let my brother keep me

(bridge)
when I was young
we were close as can be
we were all in it together
going to make it big
holding hands with a roar
where did those days go

we’re all in this together
being our brother’s keeper
we’re all going to make it through
being our brother’s keeper
what am I to but
let my brother keep me

The Case Against The ‘Woke’ Agenda


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Let me be clear — I still fucking hate the MAGA New Right with a white hot rage equal to the core of the sun. It’s just, at the moment, the center-Left (and the anti-MAGA movement in general) is doing itself no favors by being so fucking “woke.”

Let me explain.

Right now, the culture wars are all the MAGA New Right have. That’s it. They have a bunch of pithy slogans, racism, misogyny and a general hatred of the “Woke Agenda.” For all practical purposes, the Republican Party is running on fumes.

Republicans have no policies, no visioni and no agenda. So they turn to gerrymandering and voter suppression to win elections. And, when necessary, they wrap themselves up in a hatred of the misguided views of the Woke Agenda. Or, I won’t even call them “misguided.” Maybe “petty” and “hypersensitive” is a better way of putting it.

Whatever the exact nature of the Woke Agenda, the whole thing is corrosive. And that’s why the fucking Republicans love to wallow in their attacks of Critical Race Theory and “Cancel Culture.” They know it works. It works really well with the roughly 100,000 people across a few swing states that determine who is president every four years.

But it’s not like anything I say is going to change anything. The United States is tearing itself apart for a number of macro historical and political reasons and, in a sense, the “Woke Agenda” is the least of our worries. Autocracy is very, very popular within the Republican Party to the point that in 2024 – 2025 , we’re going to either slip peacefully unto autocracy or have a fucking civil war. A big one. A blood one. A nasty one.

Either way, autocracy or civil war, the Woke Era is going to come to a crashing in one way or another. And, honestly, I don’t even think that many people are “woke.” I think what’s going on in a lot of powerful people THINK that this or that woke thing will help them with young people when, in fact, I think if they just produced better content everyone would be happier.

There are no easy answers about any of this. The Right throws itself into the well of attacking wokness the moment it feels insecure about the possibility of winning an election through other, more overtly dubious means.

So, as I keep saying — we’re totally fucked. Enjoy these last few months of living in a semi-functioning Western democracy. In January 2023, everything is going to change. Things are going to get dark in the lead up to the complete clusterfuck of 2024 – 2025.

‘White Hot’ — #lyrics to a #pop #rock song

White Hot
lyrics by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

my heart burns white hot
the rage keeps me awake
knowing what happening
makes me want to act
but it’s not my place
all I can do is be
white hot
white hot
white hot

it’s not my place to say
but I want to make it that way
when I think of it
makes me want to protect you
but we all make our decisions
so all I got is feeling
white hot
white hot
white hot

(bridge)
calm as can be
relaxed and still
wishing they made
this feeling in a pill
but for now I must feel
white hot

white hot
white hot
white hot
white hot
white hot
white hot

‘Wasted’ — #lyrics to a #pop #rock song

Wasted
lyrics by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

bar hopping yet again
stagger through the dark streets
daring cars to hit me
hoping they do
then I wouldn’t have to think of you
the past is just regret
that’s why I have to say

wasted
the drown my sorrows
wasted
swimming in drink
wasted
that way I don’t have to think

I’ll have another shot
hoping it’ll put me in the dark
don’t know how to express
all the loss I feel
that you won’t be near me
it’s all over now
but the drinking

wasted
the drown my sorrows
wasted
swimming in drink
wasted
that way I don’t have to think

(bridge)
when I’m sober
the pain is intense
can’t stay on the fence
but what can I say
maybe I was made this way

wasted
the drown my sorrows
wasted
swimming in drink
wasted
that way I don’t have to think
wasted
wasted
wasted
wasted

‘Cigarettes, Beer & Tears’ — #lyrics to a #country #pop song

Cigarettes, Beer & Tears
lyrics by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

the pain inside never stops
the years pass on by
cigarettes, beer and tears
is all I got
long for your love
but it’s gone for good
as maybe it should

cigarettes, beer and tears
cigarettes, beer and tears
are my only friends I’m afraid
how long does it have to be this way
cigarettes, beer and tears
cigarettes, beer and tears

our love was once strong
but it was all a lie
you’re gone I have to admit
with a painful sigh
won’t regret another drink
while I have another smoke
the tears keep falling
into my beer

cigarettes, beer and tears
cigarettes, beer and tears
are my only friends I’m afraid
how long does it have to be this way
cigarettes, beer and tears
cigarettes, beer and tears

(bridge)
I was sober once
had you by my side
those were days of joy
now they’re gone I’m afraid
all I have is
cigarettes, beer and tears
cigarettes, beer and tears

cigarettes, beer and tears
cigarettes, beer and tears
are my only friends I’m afraid
how long does it have to be this way
cigarettes, beer and tears
cigarettes, beer and tears